I want to warn you off of 'Midnight Warning'

Midnight Warning (1932) (aka "Eyes of Mystery" and "The Midnight Warning")
Starring: William Boyd, Hooper Atchley, Huntley Gordon, Lloyd Whitlock, Claudia Dell, John Harron, and Phillips Smalley
Director: Spencer Gordon Bennett
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

After Dr. Walcott (Atchley) is nearly killed by a sniper, ace detective Thorwalt Cornish (Boyd) sets out to find the culprit, as well as why someone would want to assassinate his good friend. He discovers that the staff of hotel is keeping a secret... a secret someone is apparently willing to kill for.

For about half of its running time, "Midnight Warning" is a by-the-numbers detective film, with William Boyd serving as a low-rent Sherlock Holmes and Hooper Atchley doubling as the Dr. Watson figure and the crime victim that is "the client." Then, as one mystery is solved, the film moves into thriller territory, as the heroes uncover an apparent and mysterious conspiracy between hotel managers and city officials that involve a vanishing guest and an apparent effort to make the world believe that Enid Van Buren (Claudia Dell) insane, to the point of attempting to drive her truly mad. Finally, as the conspiracy begins to unravel, the film moves into horror territory, as the conspirators make one final push to keep their secret and silence Enid for good.

The progression through genres as the plot evolves is interesting and it would make for an excellent movie if not for two reasons: First, the horror portion of the film comes with a level of silliness that must have been eye-rolling even back in the 1930s; and, second, the film's ultimate resolution is so outrageous that it should offend the sensibilities of even the most hardcore believer in the notion that the government and our "betters" are always right. I'm going to break with habit and spoil the ending of the film and reveal that not only do the villains get away with their abuses, but virtually every character in the film becomes aware of the full scope of what they did, and they all apparently go "oh, okay... whatever."

No matter how generous I try to be, I can't suspend my disbelief to accept that a woman who was deliberately targeted for destruction by a group of rich and powerful men would just let them get away with it; I can't believe that her protective fiance would just let them get away with it; I can't believe a police consultant they manipulated to further their ends would just let them get away with it; and I can believe the seemingly upright Dr. Walcott would let them get way with it. I CAN believe that the Great Detective of the story would let them get away with it, because, while he seems to be in the Sherlock Holmes model, he seems to be utterly lacking in Holmes' sense of morality and desire to see justice done. He seems more interested in just solving mysteries and seeing his name in the papers. I can easily accept this character taking the stance that the hotel owners and city officials should get away with a cover-up and trying to destroy an innocent woman's life and sanity, because he has all of them over a barrel for future blackmail.

"Midnight Warning" is, until its last few minutes a moderately entertaining film that gets a bit wobbly towards end... and then goes off the rails like a train crashing into an oil refinery and exploding. I have a sequel in my head where Enid and her fiance (possibly aided by Walcott) take their revenge, and that imaginary film is probably why I'm rating this the lowest possible Four. The ending is so atrocious that it soured me on everything that came before.

This is not a film I can recommend... unless you've set yourself the goal of watching every Claudia Dell movie, or are doing a scholarly paper on the differences in films from before and after the implementation of the Hays Code for production standards.

No cheers for 'Cheers of the Crowd"

Cheers of the Crowd (1935)
Starring: Russell Hopton, Harry Holman, Irene Ware, Bradley Page, John Dilson, Wade Boteler, John Quillan, Roberta Gale, and Betty Blythe
Director: Vin Moore
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

When a publicity stunt staged to save an failing Broadway show succeeds beyond his wildest imagination, Lee Adams (Hopton) exposes his boss (Dilson) to blackmail by a sleazy business manager (Page); his reporter girlfriend (Ware) to career ruin; and an old friend (Holman) to possible jail-time.

"Cheers of the Crowd" has a nice set-up, unfolds in a steady fashion with complications and stakes-raisings happening pretty much when you'd expect them to, and then wraps itself up in a happy ending for all--except the bad guy. And yet, the film doesn't work, because this very well constructed frame has been draped with half-developed story elements that the scriptwriter appears to have been afraid of taking as far as they needed to go, or which go nowhere.

The perfect storm of these flaws is embodied in the film's rather unremarkable villain. There are some really interesting story elements hinted at in his actions and references made to other characters, but they aren't developed. Even his final fate at the end of the movie is half-baked and unsatisfactory (unlike the nice wrap-ups that every other character gets).

It's a shame the film has such a shoddy script, because the actors all give nice performances... and they are especially admirable since much of the cast were at the end of their careers. (It's always sad to realize that Irene Ware, who was done in not due to a lack of talent or dedication, but due to being part of failed projects. She doesn't have much to do in this film, but she brightens every scene she's in.)

"Cheers of the Crowd" can be streamed without additional charge by Amazon Prime members. I'm not sure if it's worth you time, though. It's a generally uplifting move story-wise, but the execution is sorely lacking.

'She-Wolf of London' is a disappointment

She-Wolf of London (aka "The Curse of the Allenbys") (1946)
Starring: June Lockhart, Don Porter, Jan Wiley, Sara Haden, and Dennis Hoey
Director: Jean Yarbrough
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

Young heiress Phyllis Allenby (Lockhart) comes to fear that she has fallen victim to a family curse and has begun committing grisly murders in a nearby park. Her fiance (Porter) sets about to prove her fears wrong by finding the real killer.

"She-Wolf of London" is a slightly lethargic thriller that's more of a mystery than a monster movie, despite the title. It could be that this is a movie that's become predictable given the hundreds of similar films that have been made since its release in 1946, but I pretty much knew how it was going to resolve some five-ten minutes in, as well the true reason for the Allenby curse's return.

Usually, I don't mind being right about guessing where a film is heading before it gets there, particuarly when the filmmmakers throw in some nice bits of misdirection that make me suspect I'm wrong... and the actions of Phyllis's insensitive friend Carol (Wiley) were so well orchestrated that they made me do just that--could she REALLY be that much of a bitch without trying, I had to ask myself? Unfortunately, in the case of this movie, when it does arrive at the ending I had already guessed, it completely botches it. Setting up Carol as a possibility for the she-wolf was really the only decent bit of storytelling here, everything else being very pedestrian and the ending being a suspenseless, badly written and badly staged cop-out.

I wish more effort and care had been put into giving "She-Wolf of London" a better ending. I became very interested in the film about halfway through when I realized that its storyline was very close to what the 1941 classic "The Wolf Man" (review here ) was originally supposed to be--a psychological thriller where the "werewolf" might just be a deluded psychopath whose "transformation" is a figment of a diseased mind--and this concept could have been put to far better use than it is here. I might have felt the letdown of the poorly executed ending more sharply because I got my hopes up for what was coming, but I suspect it's more likely the pathetic ending is simply the natural outcome of a production where quality wasn't a top priority. After all, this is a film set in 1890s London, with lead characters who are all British bluebloods, but none of the stars make even a halfhearted attempt at a British accent.

In the final analysis, this is a shoddy movie that is very solidly deserving of the 4/10 rating I'm giving it.

This 'Conspiracy' isn't worth uncovering

Conspiracy (1930)
Starring: Bessie Love, Ned Sparks, Hugh Trevor, Gertrude Howard, Rita La Roy, and Donald MacKenzie
Director: Christy Cabanne
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

After killing a drug kingpin, Margaret (Love) is hiding from both the drug syndicate and the police, her identity as the killer still unknown. Then a crime writer turned amateur detective, "Little Nemo" (Sparks), decides to solve the case, gets onto her trail, and may expose her to cops and crooks alike.

When I reviewed "The Sawdust Ring", I said that I could easily see why D.W. Griffith was sure Bessie Love was going to be a star from the moment he first saw her, and why she did indeed become a huge star during the 1920s. In that film, she had a certain charisma that almost seemed to make her leap off the screen. In "Conspiracy", however, very little of that aura is evident... in fact, the performance she gives here barely distinguishes her from a generic "damsel in distress"-type character. (I might even argue that her performance seems a bit off, since she's playing a character who's been undercover with a drug gang for several months. Sure, she's just stabbed someone to death as the film starts, and later she's been cooped up with an obnoxious asshole for two weeks, but I would still expect something more than confusion and panic to each and every situation she encounters.)

Perhaps Love was modulating her performance to be complimentary to the boring, bland stock hero played by Hugh Trevor. Maybe she was trying to be lowkey so Ned Sparks' supremely annoying, grumpy old man character would seem even more annoying and grumpy. Or maybe she knew she was in a badly directed third-rate movie with a weak script full of squandered opportunities and only one mildly interesting twist, and she wasn't giving it her all. Whatever the reason, there are only two times in "Conspiracy" where we see glimmers of the Love that graced the screen 15 years earlier: During the obligatory insta-romance-sparking scene where she tells her tale of woe to Trevor's dull alleged man of action, and during the scene where Sparks' character threatens to turn her over to the police, and she in turn threatens to bash his brains in with a paperweight.

Still, even if Love had given the performance of her career, she probably couldn't have saved this movie which leads with its very best scenes and then steadily goes down hill. The biggest problem here, really, is that the filmmakers couldn't decide if they were making a comedy or a thriller or a melodrama; or if the central character was Margaret, Love's caught-in-the-middle woman on the run; Little Nemo, Sparks' annoying and obnoxious and played-strictly-for-laughs crime writer; or Trevor's boring feature section reporter. It also doesn't help the movie that anything remotely suspenseful happens off-screen or in a flashback (where we already know the outcome).

As terrible as this movie is, and as disappointed as I was with Bessie Love's performance, I did keep watching. Ned Sparks as Little Nemo was entertaining in a train-wreck sort of way... and I watched with captivated awe while Sparks and Gertrude Howard (as Little Nemo's beleaguered black housekeeper) played through a series of comedic (but extremely unfunny) and deeply racist exchanges. Also, Rita La Roy's femme fatal-ish character that shows up at about the halfway point as an agent of the drug ring trying to milk Little Nemo for information and seduce him into turning Margaret over to the gang when he finds her, was a lot of fun.

Unless you're a huge Ned Sparks fan (I think this was the closest this accomplished character actor ever came to playing the lead); want an opportunity to be able to tell exactly how brilliant Bessie Love is in some of her other roles; or are looking for an old movie with some racists scenes to fill you with righteous outrage, there are far better movies to spend your time on. (But if you do decide to check it out, I recommend you watch it for free on YouTube.)

Ending a series on a low note

Wig-Wag (1935)
Starring: Dorothy Granger, Jack Mulhall, Grady Sutton, Jane Darwell, and Carol Tevis
Director: Sam White
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

After his fiance (Granger) breaks their engagement just before the wedding, Jack (Mulhall) decides to win her back by making her jealous. To do this, he convinces his friend Grady (Sutton) to dress up like a woman and pretend to be his new bride.

Aside from the very first installment, this is the weakest entry in the "The Blonde and the Redhead" series. It's almost as if the series came full circle, but in the worst possible way.

The problem with "Wig-Wag" is that it wants to rely on slapstick humor, but what it offers in that department is executed without energy and in a very feeble fashion. I don't know if it was under-rehearsed or ad-libbed on the set, but the performers weren't leaning into it. Nor was the production department for that matter; sometimes, slapstick is made funnier with exaggeration through sound effects... but that wasn't done here.

The filmmakers would have done viewers a service if they'd focused more on dialogue and characters here. I suppose they did as much with homosexuality and gender roles as they could in the 1930s, but the scenes where the cross-dressing Grady is in "danger" are the most amusing, especially the awkward kissing scenes. These scenes also contain the only truly funny lines in the film, with the "She's the biggest thing to come into my life" being prime among them. (And Sutton is BIG in this picture, given they put an already tall man in heels.)

As for the actors, they seem to be giving it their best, considering what they're working with. Jack Mullhall and Dorothy Grangers are the stars here, with Grady Sutton supporting them nicely; he is mostly serves as the straight man, which is an odd phrase to say about a hulking cross-dresser. Carol Tevis' role is the smallest she's had in any of the episodes, whether it be screen-time or role in the plot. She could have been left out entirely, and it wouldn't have made a difference.

"Wig-Wag" is the fourth and final short included on the second DVD collection of these RKO short films. It's the most risque of them humor-wise, but, as mentioned, it's also one of the worst when it comes to execution. Still, this is a collection worth checking out, as it also contains two of the best entries in the series, "Bridal Bail" and "Contented Calves".

Good idea, lousy execution in "Castle of Evil"

Castle of Evil (1966)
Starring: Scott Brady, Virginia Mayo, David Brian, Lisa Gaye and William Thourlby
Director: Francis D. Lyon
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

A mad scientist (Thourlby) invites his relatives to his remote estate where his robot double proceeds to stalk and kill them in order to avenge a disfiguring accident he suffered years before.


I don't usually give away story twists in my teaser summaries, but in the case of "Castle of Evil", it doesn't matter. Despite the rating of 4, I don't recommend that you waste your time with this movie.

Which is too bad, because the script for this film is actually pretty good. It's a great retro-fusion of the "dark old house" and "mad scientist" film genres that flourished in the 1930s and 1940s, and the featured actors all give respectable performances in their various parts.

Unfortunately, the writer and cast are let down by an incompetent director. The staging of every scene is flat and lifeless, no opportunity for padding is left untapped--except for the ending that is inexplicably sudden and abrupt--and all the bad choices sap every bit of life from the film, driving even the most friendly-minded viewer into a stupour of boredom.

I love the "mad scientist" and "dark old house" movies--as the countless reviews of films in those genres here attest to--and I really wanted to like "Castle of Evil". But, it's just too incompently done. That is a terrible shame, because there's an excellent script that went to waste here.

(THIS is the kind of movie that Hollywood big shots sould be remaking, not "Karate Kid" and other movies that were already good. They should show themselves to be REAL artists and filmmakers who, if they are so devoid of creativity that they can't make original films, should at the very least take misfires and give them second chances.)

'Murder on the Bridle Path' disappoints

Murder on the Bridle Path (1936)
Starring: James Gleason, Helen Broderick, Louise Latimer, John Carroll, Owen Davis Jr., Christian Rub, Leslie Fenton, John Miltern, Willy Best, and Sheila Terry
Directors: William Hamilton and Edward Killy
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

When the murder of a young woman (Terry) is disguised to look like a riding accident, Police Inspector Oscar Piper (Gleason) once again receives assistance from his friend and amateur detective Hildegarde Withers (Broderick) in sorting truth from lies and shady characters from murderers.

"Murder on the Bridle Path" is the fourth film in the Hildegarde Withers series and the first one to feature an actress other than Edna May Oliver in the role of sleuthing school marm Ms. Withers. It's also the weakest entry so far.

While the replacement of the self-described "horse-faced" Oliver with the "moon-faced" and younger Helen Broderick is an immediately noticeable change, it's not actually the problem that does the movie in; Broderick actually does a good job as the acerbic school teacher. No, what damages this movie beyond saving is its script.

The Hildegarde Withers movies are detective movies, but they are also comedies. While the detective side of things is passable, the attempts at comedy are absolute and total disasters. I don't think I have seen a movie where almost every single laugh line is a complete dud--and the only remotely funny one is responded to  by a character with "are you trying to be funny?" (To which I actually said to the screen, "Yes! And he's the only one who's succeeded so far!")

Another drawback is that Oscar Piper is portrayed as an absolute moron in this film. It's like the character, who was previously shown to be a good and intelligent police officer that sometimes goes for the first obvious suspect due to pressure from his superiors, was replaced with the stock stupid cop character that so often infests B-movie murder mysteries. This is even worse than the unfunny quips, because even if you can't write comedy to save your life, you can at least get established characters right when working on a series.

On the positive side, Helen Broderick is actually a nice replace for Oliver, since she has Hildegarde Withers' crisp and caustic attitude down pat. Broderick was also an accomplished comedic actress, so this SHOULD also have been a positive. Unfortunately, the material she has to work with in this film is so unfunny that you can't tell. Perhaps her comedic gifts saved this film from being even more miserable than it is... but I think it's more likely that it proves that even a good actor can't save bad material (no matter what the saying says).

'High Toned' is pretty low-brow

High Toned (aka "High Tones") (1930)
Starring: Ford Washington Lee and John William Sublett (Buck & Bubbles)
Director: Paul Powell
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

The Wildcat (Sublett) returns home after serving in World War I  to find his job and his girl have been taken by a monacle-wearing immigrant from the West Indies.

Back in their day, Buck & Bubbles were a hugely successful black song-and-dance/comedy duo, and one half of it, John William Sublett, is credited with inventing a particular style of tap-dancing and being someone Fred Astaire sought out for dance lessons. However, their talents aren't well represented in this film, which, according to marketing materials from the time, is one of six adaptations of Hugh Wiley short stories about an African American who was in the US Army during WWI. There's almost no dancing in the film--just a single brief bit of softshoe shuffle--and the jokes are minimal and mostly unfunny. In fact, this short film has the length, pacing, and overall feel of a substandard sit-com from the 1980s. I suppose in that sense it was ahead of its time, but unless you're a fan of substandard sit-coms or Race Films, there might not be a whole lot to interest

One thing to be aware of if your one of this breed of 21st humans who are outraged (OUTRAGED!) by anything offensive or racist, this is a film you want to stay away from as it contains just about every negative stereotype about blacks that you would find in a film from this period. Even if you do decide to brave it, you might want to just stop the DVD player as the climax is wrapping up. While I found the way the film used the "blacks are superstitious and cowardly black people" stereotype interesting--native American blacks use it against the Haitian interloper--it might be the thing that will cause you to have a nervous breakdown.

"High Toned" is one of six short films included on "Ultra-Rare Pre-Code Comedies, Volume 4:  How Comedies Are Born".

'Flirting in the Park' is a weak start

Flirting in the Park (1933)
Starring: June Brewster, Carol Tevis, Grady Sutton, Eddie Nugent, Brooks Benedict, and Donald Haines
Director: George Stevens
Rating: Three of Ten Stars

Two office ladies (Brewster and Tevis) spend a Saturday afternoon trying to one-up each other while on dates in the park.

"Flirting in the Park" was the first in a string of short films starring June Brewster, Carol Tevis, and Grady Sutton, all of which have been collected on a two-volume DVD series titled "Blondes and Redheads." When I first started watching and reviewing these films, I wondered why the Alpha Video releases didn't present them in order, but instead led off with films from the later period of the series.
Now that I've watched "Flirting in the Park", I understand why.

While "Flirting in the Park" starts out with some nice workplace comedy, not to mention a look into office life nearly a century ago, the viewing experience quickly sours. It's great to dislike the villainous manager who sexually harasses June (played by June Brewster) and then forces her to work Saturday afternoon when the rest of the staff gets to leave early, but it's not great when the characters we're supposed to like turn out to be petty, mean, and shallower than parts of the lake they go boating on. If this had been the first film in the series I'd seen, I don't know if I'd bothered with any others, until the day where my pile of unwatched DVDs was almsot empty. (A day that will likely never come because I have YEARS of backlog to go through.)

Much can be forgiven for characters who are funny, and that's the biggest problem here: There's very little that's funny in this film, even in the office where the film was at its most amusing. The only character here who has any charm to it is the one portrayed by Carol Tevis. She's socially awkward, but wants to be a guy magnet like her friend June... or at least be SEEN as such by June (even after June steals back the date that Carol stole from her early in the film). Carol also has the only really funny bit during the later part of the movie, a gag revolving around her showing June how good she is at flirting. (I don't want to give anymore details, because I don't want to ruin the only truly good part of this film.)

It's a shame that this otherwise good cast is stuck playing such unpleasant, unlikable characters. This goes double for June Brewster, and, despite my distaste for the character she was playing, I found myself thinking it was a shame she was more more successful in her career. (After struggling along in mostly  minor and supporting roles from between 1932 and 1938, she gave up on acting and married a vice cop turned gaming mogul... who went onto become a founding figure of modern day Las Vegas. The parts she played in this film series may well be the biggest she ever had.)

'Lost in Limehouse' disappoints

Lost in Limehouse, or Lady Esmeralda's Predicament (1933)
Starring: John Sheehan, Walter Byron, Laura La Plante, Olaf Hytten, and Charles McNaughton
Director: Otto Brower
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

It's up to the Harold the Humble Apprentice (Byron) and Sheerluck Jones, the Great Detective Sheerluck Jones (Hytten) to rescue the fair Esmeralda (La Plante) from the evil Sir Marmaduke Rakes (Sheehan) and his Tong allies.

"Lost in Limehouse" is another short film produced by and starring members and friends of The Masquers Club to raise money for a new guild house. Its main targets for spoofing is the Sherlock Holmes stories and old-time melodramas, but along the way they also mock the Yellow Peril genre, which was popular at the time, as well as the British class structure. Maybe I've come to expect too much of these from the wild and crazy rides of "Thru Thin and Thicket" and "Stolen By Gypsies", but this film was something of a disappointment.

The first half of "Lost in Limehouse" is only mildly funny, with most jokes being poorly delivered and all attempts at physical comedy being simply lame. It is further slowed down by the presence of a completely unnessary character played by Nola Luxford that would have been key to the plot if the film had been written by decent writers. The character reappears during the film's sloppy non-ending, where her presence further underscores the sense that it really should have played a bigger role. Maybe it's just the writer in me filling in the blanks, or maybe it's because Luxford showed such charisma in her small, do-nothing part next to those she shared the scene with, that I wanted her character to be more important. It really felt like she was being set up to be a secret ally of Sir Marmaduke; maybe if this had been a longer, more serious movie, she would have been. As it stands, it would have been better if she had just been left out.

While the Sherlock Holmes spoof, which gets underway as the film enters its second act, is spot-on both plot-wise and dialogue-wise, it ends up falling mostly flat because Olaf Hytten simply isn't much of an actor. In fact, the funniest part of the Holmes spoof grow mostly out of physical comedy related to its intertwining with the Yellow Peril spoof.

The shining highlight of "Lost in Limehouse" is John Sheehan as the lampoon melodramatic villain who's kidnapped the lovely maiden with the intent of forcing her to accept his love. His performance is appropriately over-the-top, he plays well with La Plante and Byron (the two performers he shares the most scenes with), his "evil laugh" is spectacular, and it is his prominence the film's second half that makes it worthwhile. The fact that he manages to abduct Lady Esmeralda twice and tie her up three different times in a very short span makes his character all the more funny. Unfortunately, even Sheehan couldn't save this film from its abysmal script... and while it ends on a literal bang, it feels more like a whimper.

'Ticket to a Crime' starts strong, but falters

Ticket to a Crime (1934)
Starring: Ralph Graves, Lola Lane, James Burke, Charles Ray, Lois Wilson, John Elliot, and Hy Hoover
Director: Lewis Collins
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

When a financially troubled jeweler (Elliot) is murdered before he even has a chance to fully explain why he's hiring P.I. Clay Holt (Graves), Holt and his secretary (Lane) must not only find the killer, but try to learn what their job was supposed to be.

"Ticket to a Crime" is one of those films I started out liking, but which fell in my estimation as it progressed. It benefits from a pair of charismatic leads (Graves and Lane) that played well off each other, and the mystery at the center of the film is more complex that what is often the case with these low-budget films, with multiple possible motivations for the murder, as well as a slate of several likely suspects.

Unfortunately, the interesting plot and its relative complexities get derailed as the pace of the film accelerates during its second act and then rushes toward its conclusion with such a breakneck pace that the solution to the case feels lazy (and the criminal behind the action appears to be complete moron). But even before that, the character of Clay Holt (Ralph Graves) who started out as a charming, if somewhat self-absorbed rogue, has turned into a detestable and unlikable jackass.

First, there was the way he treated his secretary--she barely rated a kind word from him when she was wearing glasses and frumpy business clothing, but once she was in a party dress and without her "cheaters", he was head-over-heels in love. Was this really an amusing or endearing trait to movie-goers in the 1930s? From the moment Penny (played by Lola Lane) appeared on screen, I thought, "Wow... that's a pretty woman" and the fact that Clay Holt couldn't see that made me think he was either gay or stupid.

And, speaking of stupid, the second thing drags the character of Clay Holt down is his persistent pranking/tormenting of his former partner from his days on the police force, the slow-on-the-uptake Lt. McGinnis (James Burke, in a role he played many times over his career). Not only does he thoroughly obstruct McGinnis's investigation by withholding, and even planting fake, evidence, but he identifies a completely innocent bystander to McGinnis as a person he is seeking. Early in the film, a police official threatens to pull Holt's investigator license... given his behavior over the course of "Ticket to a Crime", not only should that license be pulled but Holt desperately needs to be prosecuted and locked up, since his behavior not only obstructed justice but it endangered both police officers and civilians.

Even if the writers hadn't completely botched the character of Holt, the rushed ending in and of itself ruins what began as a nice mystery picture. The solution to the crime is so simple that the criminal never had a chance of getting away with it in the first place: If Holt hadn't concealed evidence, even McGinnis would have identified the killer well before the disappointing Big Reveal. What's worse, the ending--the entire second half of the movie, actually, is so sloppy and rushed that we don't even find out the reason for why Clay and Penny were hired in the first place.

'The Perfect Clue' is flawed

The Perfect Clue (1935)
Starring: Dorothy Libaire, David Manners, and Richard 'Skeets' Gallagher
Director: Robert G. Vignola
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

A rebellious rich girl (Libaire) and a hard-luck ex-con (Manners) must rely on the help of her besotted friend (Gallager) when they are falsely accused and arrested for murder.

"The Perfect Clue" is a film with no clue about what it wants to be. It lurches back and forth from being a screwball comedy, to being a melodrama, to being a romantic comedy, to being a crime drama. To make matters worse, what's presented is a fair to awful example of those genres, and when it's at its best--in crime drama mode--it feels at times like we're watching scenes from an entirely different movie.

The acting ranges from standard for a film of this period and budget-level, to quite good. With the exception of one scene that feels like it was being performed for the stage, Libaire is excellent throughout. I've never been a big fan of Manners, but he is worse here than I've ever seen him; not only is he playing a fairly unpleasant character, but he's doing so with a manner that makes me wonder if he wanted to be anywhere but working on this picture. 

While Libaire and Gallagher elevate the film with their performances, everything else about it drags it down... and the Four-star rating I am giving it is on the brink of slipping to a Three.

By a curious coincidence, Libaire and Manners, who had been extremely busy and appeared in a number of successful films during the early 1930s, were at the end of their careers by the time the co-starred in "The Perfect Clue".  Libaire would only make two more films, Manning five more. 

Reefer Madness! (What more needs to be said?)

Reefer Madness (aka "Tell Your Children", "The Burning Question," "Dope Addict", and "Love Madness") (1936)
Starring: Dave O'Brien, Dorothy Short, Kenneth Craig, Carleton Young, Lilian Miles, and Thelma White
Director: Louis Gasnier
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

A societal scourge is exposed through this cautionary tale where Bill (Craig) is framed for murdering his sister (Short) and a hood (Craig) is driven mad... all because of the evils of marijuana!

"Reefer Madness" is one of those Bad Movie Night mainstays that I have been avoiding for many years. Everyone had written about it, it didn't sound all that interesting to me, and there were so many other unseen films out there. A friend gave me the "Taboo Tales" DVD collection for Christmas, and since "Reefer Madness" is the first film on the first disc, I figured the time had come to watch it.

I found that it was neither as bad nor as unintentionally funny as I had been led to believe. For the most part, it's a ham-fisted melodrama that alternatively exaggerates and misrepresents marijuana and its effect on those who use it. It moves along at a steady steady while beating viewers over the head with its anti-drug message, never being exactly boring but never being all that engaging because the characters are mostly unlikable. It gets truly interesting only in those few scenes were it goes way over the top with caricatures of marijuana smokers. Like so many drug movies, I think this is probably funnier if you're stoned while watching it.

For me, the most interesting part of the film was that I only really grew to care about the fate of Ralph, an utterly despicable thug and rapist played by Dave O'Brien. I think this was because the character was being played by one actors with honest-to-God careers in the field, and because Ralph holds a more important place in the story than even the character we're supposed to care about--the poor kid who's life is being ruined by drugs, drug pushers, and drug users. I suppose the film really is more about Ralph than Bill, since Ralph's even the subject of the movie's greatest scene, in which he beats a person to death in a fit of marijuana-driven paranoia.

I wouldn't say this film is worth going out of your way for, nor even that you should start with it if you find yourself with it included in a DVD multi-pack. The Four rating I gave it is as low as it can be without being a Three, and it barely earns that on the back of my being entertained by Dave O'Brien's performance. I suppose the nicest thing I can say about it is that it's far better than the other Dwain Esper-involved film I've watched. But, like I said above, maybe it's funnier if you're high. I understand EVERYTHING is funnier if you're high.

You might want to avoid 'Chinatown After Dark'

Chinatown After Dark (1931)
Starring: Rex Lease, Billy Gilbert, Carmel Myers, Barbara Kent, and Frank Mayo
Director: Stuart Paytom
Rating: Three of Ten Stars

Jim Bonner (Lease) tries to unravel the mystery of his brother's disappearance, while being hounded by an incompetent police detective (Gilbert) and a sinister Chinese criminal mastermind (Myers).

There a scraps of interesting story elements scattered throughout this poorly written, unevenly paced, wretchedly acted,, and badly staged Yellow Peril-style thriller. Most fascinating to me was the casual yet nasty racism on display when the chief homicide detective assigns the investigation of the murder of a well-to-do Chinese man to an officer he states won't be able to solve the case.

Although I reference a mystery in my summary above, there are actually three different mysteries in the film, none of which are handled very well. First, the reason why the villain wants the Chinese dagger is the film's first focus is revealed way too early. Second, the disappearance of the hero's brother (and the hero subsequently coming under suspicion of murder) would easily have been resolved by the hero doing to the police--something which he never really did not have a reason to do, other than there wouldn't be a movie. Third, the question of "how will the hero clear his nane?" was never really a question, because of the ineptitude with which the two previous questions have been handled.

Watching this film, I repeatedly found myself saying, "that would make an interesting story" as some plot nugget or off-hand reference came and went on the screen. Unfortunately, that interesting story is not found in "Chinatown After Dark."

What is also not really found, since this film headlines Carmel Myers, was the elaborate costumes that I imagine some of the audience went looking for. Although little known today, Myers was a huge star during the Silent Ere who was known for wearing spectacular and exotic outfits in her films. Here, while she is midly exotic in her look, there is nothing particularly amazing about her costume; I suppose, in some ways, that can be taken as a reflection of how her star steadily faded after she made her transition to talkies.

I think this film is probably only of interest to hardcore lovers of old films... and even then, you probably don't need to rush to see it. But, if you have nothing better to do, you can watch it right here, right now by clicking below.

'Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster' review

Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster (1965)
Starring: Marilyn Hanold, Lou Cutell, Robert Reilly, Jim Karen, and Karen Grant
Director: Robert Gaffney
Rating: Two of Ten Stars

A sexy alien queen (Hanold) and her pointy-eared second-in-command Dr. Nadir (Cutell) come to Earth to abduct bikini babes to replenish the breeding stock on their homeland. Unfortunately for them, their arrival on our world interferes with the test-flight of a cybernetic astronaut (Reilly), causing his ship to crash near the alien landing site.

Some movies derive their entertainment value from the fact that you will spend the entire time you're watching wondering if what you're watching was really that nonsensical on paper, and how one director could make so many bad decisions in the course of one movie.

Even in 1964, the "Mars needs women"-type scenario must have seemed silly, although it does provide an excuse to show attractive women in little bikinis so one can understand why the filmmakers and viewers ran with it. But one wonders what bizarre fetish the writers or director must have been trying to bring to the screen with the oddball "physical exam" that the aliens use to determine the fitness of the women for alien breeding stock.

That said, for a film that was clearly designed to show off fit birds (to borrow a phrase from Joe Bloke's excellent blog) the director made a bizarre choice in casting Playboy-Bunny-turned-actress Marilyn Hanold and yet hardly showing her body off at all. Viewers can see hints of a sexy costume, but she spends most of the movie seated, so it hardly gets shown off.

The only thing that makes the film mildly interesting, aside from the bikini babes if you're hard up, is when the heroine gets grabbed by the aliens and almost becomes chow for the Spacemonster of the film's title, and the runaway robot who stumbles his way through the movie to ultimately serve as something of a literal deus ex machina plot device. Unfortunately, he doesn't quite qualify as a "Frankenstein" in any sense, but instead serves as an illustration of the illiteracy that seems to have been a mainstay of the movie business from the get-go.





(By the way, if I had watched this this movie three-four weeks ago, "ROLF: Attack of the Commies from Jupiter" may have been an unauthorized adaptation of this film given there are some similarities content-wise. Heck... there may still be one forthcoming, given its mostly designed. :) )

Great cast and locations, but lackluster direction

The Green Glove (aka "The Gauntlet") (1952)
Starring: Glenn Ford, Geraldine Brooks, and George Macready
Director: Rudolph Mate
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

A down-on-his-luck US Army veteran (Ford) returns to France in the years following WW2 to retrieve a gem-encrusted relic he left behind in a villa on D-Day. But he is soon framed for murder by an unscrupulous art dealer (Macready) who is also trying to recover the artifact, and treasure becomes secondary to dodging police pursuit.

"The Green Glove" should have been much better than it is, given the great cast (which, in addition to the stars listed above include such genre-picture stalwarts as Cedrick Hardwicke and Gaby Andre) and the spectacular settings it was filmed in... and that doesn't even take into account the smorgasbord of thriller conventions that are crammed into the story, what with it being a man wrongfully accused on a treasure hunt with a good-hearted woman while being pursued by mysterious forces.

But, despite all the potential here, the director seems incapable of generating any real suspense, squandering almost every build-up with a confrontation that is either badly staged, too abrupt, or both. In fact, the part of the film that works best is a comic relief sequence where Glenn Ford and Geraldine Brooks' characters spend the night at an isolated country inn. But I think that part of the movie shines mostly because you've got two good actors doing their thing without clumsy staging getting in the way... and because everything else around them is lackluster.

The director's insecurity with his subject matter (or maybe the producers recognizing the dog they had on their hands) is made painfully evident right up front, with an over-use of narration, setting a stage that the film itself was setting far more effectively as it unfolded.

Although... the "insta-romance" that develops between Ford and Brooks isn't as hard to swallow as it is in several other films of this kind. This is both because there seems to be real chemistry between the two performers, but also because everything else around them is so unconvincing that the you'll find you'll want something to hand onto as the film unfolds.

For this kind of story done right, you should check out "The 39 Steps" or "Young and Innocent" from Alfred Hitchcock.






Note: One of the things that attracted me to this movie was a half-remembered comic book series that I read as a kid. I think it, too, was called "The Green Glove" (or maybe just "The Glove") and it was a quirky horror strip about a cursed, jewel-encrusted gauntlet that entered the lives of the characters and caused some even of poetic justice or transformation before being lost again until the next episode. From the art style, I think the series must have originally been English or Spanish in origin, even though I was reading them in Danish translations.

Does anyone else remember these comics?

'Horrors of Spider Island' is horrible

Horrors of Spider Island (aka "The Spider's Web", "It's Hot in Paradise", and "Girls of Spider Island") (1962)
Starring: Alex D'Arcy, Helga Franck, and a bunch of washed-up dancers and wanna-be porn actresses.
Director: Fritz Boettger
Rating: Two of Ten Stars

An impresario (D'Arcy) and his Girl Friday (Franck) are on their way to Singapore with a recently hired troupe of obnoxious, bitchy strippers and chorus girls when their plane crashes. They take refuge on a desolate south sea island, where the heat makes the girls strip down to bare essentials, where they are menaced by a goofy-looking spider puppet, and where their fearless leader (who's named Gary) is soon transformed into a hideous half-man, half-spider creature. And that's when things get REALLY boring.


I understand there's an "adults only" version of this film that was released, That's not the version I saw. Maybe nudity makes it more interesting, although I sincerely doubt that. Aside from being boring and full of unsexy sexiness, this film features such slipshod use of stock footage that even Edward D. Wood, Jr would grab director Fritz Boettger by the lapels and scream, "What in God's name were you doing man?!" For example, the doomed plane that carries Gary and the babes to Spider Island starts as a two-engine jet, becomes a four-engine plane while in the air, and transforms into a completely different kind of plane (a bomber, I think) as it crashes.

The only horror you'll find in this film is the realization you will never get the 80 minutes you spend watching it back.

Who knew the ocean was that deep?

The Phantom From 10,000 Leagues (1956)
Starring: Kent Taylor, Kathy Downs, and Michael Whale
Director: Dan Milner
Rating: One of Ten Stars

When dead fishermen and skin-divers start washing up on the beach near a small university, with radiation burns on their bodies, marine researcher and scientific genius crack-pot Dr. Ted Stevens (Taylor) senses that maybe it is his theories that have been put to nefarious use. He hooks up with the beautiful Lois (Downs), the daughter of a marine researcher who is at the very least Stevens' equal in the scientific genius crack-pot department, Prof. King (Whale). Can it be that King has accidentally (or purposefully) created a super-weapon using oceanography and atomic radiation? The agents of sinister foreign powers and the square-jawed Defense Department investigators think so... and the bizarre sea creature lurking in the waters off the coast tends to agree with the theory as well.


"The Beast from 10,000 Leagues" is a Z-grade example of the 1950s-style sci-fi/monster flick where a scientist successful proves that we won't have better living through science, and that there really are Secrets Man Was Not Meant to Know.

Unfortunately, the extreme low budget (much of which was probably spent on a rather nicely done special effect toward the end of the movie--assuming that wasn't footage borrowed from some other movie), tragically bad and dull camera work, the same rowboat used in every shot that requires a boat, a goofy-looking sea monster whose preferred method of attack seems to be hugging his victims to death, and a script that's even more illiterate than the film's title might imply add up to a disaster of a movie. Its only saving grace is that it moves along fast enough, and offers enough moments of unintentional comedy, to not send the viewer completely into a boredom coma.

Noteworthy only for featuring the firston-screen eye-ball eating and zombie-rape?

Maniac (aka "Sex Maniac") (1934)
Starring: Bill Woods, Horace B. Carpenter, Ted Edwards, Phyllis Diller, and Thea Ramsey
Director: Dwain Esper
Rating: Two of Ten Stars

Don (Woods), a mad doctor's assistant, kills his boss (Carpenter) in self-defense. Then, using his great skills as an impersonator, he pretends to be the doctor to cover up the crime long enough to dispose of the body. Things get worse and weirder from there.

"Maniac" is a loosely based on (well, I should probably say "ripped off from") Edgar Allen Poe's "The Black Cat".

The filmmakers also pretend that they are giving us an intelligent tale of a man's descent into madness, like Poe's story "The Black Cat". As the film starts, our mad doctor's assistant is unwilling to even steal bodies for his boss's experiments in reanimating the dead, but by the film's end, he's plotting and executing all sorts of violence and depravity while laughing and carrying on in ways that made the dearly departed mad doctor Meirschultz look well adjusted.

I say it "pretends", because their true goal was to simply shock the audience as much as possible--and in 1934, this film would have been pretty damn shocking. The cat eyeball-poppling and eating scene is startling and appalling even when viewed with the very jaded eye of a modern movie viewer who's sat through hundreds of films along the lines of this one.

With copious nudity, a maniac raping a zombie girl, dancers walking around in their undies, perverted morgue attendants, cat-fur harvesting, and the aforementioned eyeball-eating scene, the film is clearly designed first and foremost to cram as much "objectionable" material into its 50-minute running time. I imagine this film showed in "adult" movie houses Back in the Day, and I can't help but wonder what the initial reaction might have been to it.

This can't be described as a good movie by any standards. It's even too dull to be suitable for a Bad Movie Nite--although there are admittedly plenty of moments of unintended hilarity from the overacting by just about every cast member and the horribly purple dialogue they deliver. However, if you want to see how even early filmmakers pushed far beyond the boundaries of good taste, "Maniac" is worth checking out. (I suspect it has some sort of place in cinematic history--"first eyeball-eating scene on film", or "first zombie-rape on film"?--so maybe all who consider themselves true cinema-buffs should check it out.

The Shadow missing in 'International Crime'?

International Crime (1938)
Starring: Rod La Rocque and Astrid Allwyn
Director: Charles Lamont
Rating: Three of Ten Stars

There are times when I wonder why production companies who spend good money on licensing existing properties don't keep their writers and directors in line when it comes to creating the screen adaptations. Heck, I don't understand *at all* why the owners of properties that are licenced don't insist on some form of oversight and/or quality control veto-rights over what the licensee does with their creations. (And I hope to some day be fortunate enough to work on a propety where the owner doesn't care what the heck I do with it... so far, I've never quite been in that position, as every licensed property I've worked on has come with a very attentive and concerned person reviewing my work for the licensor.)

Take the truly awful adaptation of The Shadow that is "International Crime". In this film, Lamont Cranston is a hardboiled radio commentator and criminologist who has a bad relationship with the police and solves crime more through trickery than detection; he's basically a stock lead character for low-budget detective comedies from that era. There's none of the mystery (and none of the horror/thriller aspect) that surrounds The Shadow and his cases... and Lamont Cranston exhibits no supernatural ability to "cloud men's mind." His identity as The Shadow is widely known, as it's the name of his radio show rather than a secret alter-ego.



Worse, the ever-charming and resourceful Margo Lane from the real stories and radio plays, who was always there to help both Cranston and his Shadow alter-ego, isn't anywhere to be found in "The Shadow Strikes," and is replaced in "International Crime" by an annoying girl reporter (played by Astrid Allwyn, who is really the only attractive thing about "International Crime"... even if she shows virtually no acting ability).

All in all, this feels like someone took an unused script that was sitting around the producer's office and slapped "The Shadow" on it and renamed the main character "Lamont Cranston." However, the true is probably that Hollywood creatives were arrogant morons who felt they could "improve" upon properties long before "Modesty Blaise" and "Jonah Hex" (just to name two of dozens upon dozens of examples). The more things change in the film biz, the more they stay the same.