A great effort with serious flaws

Killing Time (2010)
Starring: John Carlin and Zander Riggs
Director: Phil Baumhardt
Rating: Six of Ten Stars

A young man (Carlin) sits alone in a room, waiting...

"Killing Time" is a short film that resulted from a student project, but it's very impressive. I really like the lighting (even if it's a little on the dark side), the use of sound, the placement of the camera. All-in-all, it does a great job in capturing the film noir mood and style.

Except for a couple minor details.

Usually, when I post student films I come across during my trawling through YouTube, I don't get too critical of them--they're student films for crying out loud, so if I'm impressed or amused, I leave it at that! There's generally no point in nitpicking them: If I think they're worth the time of the visitors to the blog, they're good enough, period. 

In the specific case of "Killing Time", the flaws break the illusion Phil Baumhardt was going for with such force that it almost ruined the whole thing for me. Still, the overall effort is good enough that I think it's worth checking out... even if you have to click through to YouTube to do so. (And if you do... maybe you can spot the flaws that I did. If you do, let me know if you think I'm being too critical.)

Musical Monday with Head Cleaner

I can't understand a word when it comes to the lyrics of this song--they could literally be Greek, since Head Cleaner is a death metal band hailing from Greece--which is almost always the case when it comes to the growled/screamed vocals of this genre. I assume the lyrics carry a theme about wicked and corrupt people in power coming to brutal ends, because of the song's title and the music video that comes with it. It's a neat short film about a corrupt business executive or political bureaucrat who meets his end at the hands of an axe-wielding killer who may or not be a supernatural being acting in the service of Justice. Check it out; the music isn't to my liking, but the short film got my imagination going... and there may even be a NUELOW Games post with some roleplaying game stuff as a result.

Head Cleaner: Crime and Punishment (2012)

Starring: Anonymous actors

Director: Jim Evgenidis

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

For more music videos and photography from Jim Evgenidis (who was also the front man of Head Cleaner), visit his page at Icon Filmworx.

A plotless collection of winter sports jokes

Cracked Ice (1927)
Starring: No one; it's a completely silent cartoon
Director: Paul Terry

Rating: Five of Ten Stars

Cartoon animals frolic in a winter wonderland--sledding, skiing, ice skating... you name it, they do it. Meanwhile, their keeper tries to maintain order and safety.

"Cracked Ice" is an offering from the proto-Van Beuren animation department, back when it was run by Paul Terry. It was originally an entry in the long-running "Aesop's Fables" series.

Whether it's signs of things to come, or evidence that John Foster, Vern Stallings, and the rest were carrying on a grand tradition is hard for me to say... but this is the most plotless, nonsensical cartoon I've discovered among the offerings from the Van Beuren Corporation and related operations. It's devoid of any semblance of plot, and I just deleted a paragraph from this post that talked about all the things in this cartoon that don't make any sense. Why? Because as I was typing, I realized that I was faulting a cartoon featuring a skiing hippo and ice skating cats for including things that didn't make sense.

One critique I am going to let stand is that this early Van Beuren release contains another mainstay of many of their offerings: Sometimes they don't know when to move on from a gag. There are couple bits in "Cracked Ice" that start funny or cute but are then dragged out to the point of becoming tedious. Thankfully, it's the minority, but the trend for the next decade seems to be getting established here.

My customary teaser summary at the top of this review isn't just a teaser here--it relates everything that's contained in the cartoon (except the particulars of the gags). If you're in the mood for cartoon animals being goofy in the winter-time, you should watch the cartoon embedded below. One thing's for sure--it's as entertaining as anything you're going to see from the Winter Olympics.

2/2/22 -- Day of the Doppelgangers!

Today, on 2/2/22, we're sharing stories about doppelgangers, here and at Terror Titans. We hope you enjoy... and we hope you don't encounter your doppelgangers in your wanderings today.

Doppelganger (2020)

Starring: Michael Diulus

Director: Michael Diulus

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

A writer (Diulus) drifts off to sleep while working and finds himself in a struggle for his soul.

"Doppelganger" is a straight-forward, no-frills supernatural horror short that captures the feeling of dreams dead-on. I appreciate its simplicity, and it shows that a single person with a camera and a good eye can create a great experience for the viewer. (The only criticisms I have amount to little more than nitpicks. But I think the main character might have an easier time writing if he sat at a desk; I was more worried for the laptop than his safety for a while there; and the strangling bit was... well, a bit too obvious that it was just one guy and a camera making the film.)

Check out "Doppelganger" by clicking below. I think you'll like it.

You can see more from Michaek Diulus on his YouTube channel by clicking here. 

Worthwhile film with great plot and bad dialogue

The Secrets of Wu Sin (1932)
Starring: Lois Wilson, Grant Withers, Eddie Boland, Toshia Mori, Tetsu Komai, Richard Loo, Dorothy Revier, and Robert Warwick
Director: Richard Thorpe
Rating: Six of Ten Stars

Nona (Wilson), a destitute young writer is rescued from a suicide attempt and given a lifeline by way of a job by newspaper editor James Manning (Withers). In order to repay his kindness, Nona works along-side with a veteran reporter (Boland) to use her Chinatown contacts to investigate a human smuggling ring in the hopes of delivering a spectacular scoop. The reporters attract the attention of both the sinister leader of the crime ring, Wu Sin (Komai) and even more dangerous people who hide behind shields of respectability. 

"The Secrets of Wu Sin" is jam-packed with plot and characters, hits the ground running and doesn't stop until "The End" appears on the screen. Amazingly, and unlike what happens in many films of this period, the main plot and the subplots are all introduced sensibly (if with a healthy dose of melodrama) and all unfold at a steady and engaging pace. Although I saw some of the twists coming as soon as the involved characters appeared on screen--either because I've seen many hundreds of crime dramas, or because it's been 90 years since this film premiered and some of the story elements that were surprising then are stock fare now--but the story was so well executed that it didn't matter. (It was a little more straight-forward than I initially imagined, but it perhaps even worked even better than what I imagined.)

An aspect that makes this film worth watching today is that the story deals with a number of issues that pop up in the U.S. media even to this day, such as illegal immigration. It also makes the point that criminals that exploit recent immigrants to the U.S.--especially those who come here illegally--would not be able to do what they do without the assistance of "respectable" Americans, as well as the wealthy who want the cheap labor and captive labor that illegal immigrants have no choice but to provide. Would there still be criminals exploiting immigrant communities? Certainly. But would they be able to be as exploitive and assertive without the help and protection of those from outside the communities who benefit and even abet their activities? No. This was true in 1932, and it remains a sad truth in 2022.

There's also an interesting side issue of second generation (or later) immigrants and how they might interact with more recent immigrants, as well as how they view and are viewed by immigrant communities. This issue is carried in the romantic subplot involving Nona's recent Chinese immigrant friend Miao (played by Toshia Mori) and American-born Charlie (Richard Loo). Miao is under the thumb of Wu Sin, and Charlie ends up being swept into Tong activities as a result, despite his continued appeal that Miao should abandon her traditional Chinese ways. It's an interesting subplot that might be derailed by the main plot, or perhaps even cause the main plot to rerail, in a less-efficiently plotted movie. It also helps that Miao and Charlie are both likeable characters, portrayed by likeable actors.

And speaking of actors: One remarkable thing about "The Secrets of Wu Sin", for a film of this type and from this period, is that all the leading Chinese characters are played by Asian actors rather than Caucasians in make-up that may of varying degrees of ridiculousness. Sure--only one of these actors is actually of Chinese extraction (Richard Loo, who, ironically, is best known for playing Japanese characters), but it's nice to see Asians on-screen, playing Asian characters, be they villains, victims, or heroes.

What isn't remarkable is the acting, even taking into the account the universal charisma and screen presence of everyone in a significant part in "The Secrets of Wu Sin". Even by low-budget, early talkies standards, the actors are almost universally struggling with awful dialog that is made more obvious by stagey performances. The bad dialog is one of the few weak spots in this film, but it so pervasive that it dragged the film down from my awarding it a Seven Rating to giving it a High Six instead. Interestingly, the exchanges are livelier and less stilted in scenes featuring Eddie Borland, whether he's sharing the screen with Tetsu Komai, Lois Wilson, or Grant Withers. Maybe more of those lines were ad-libbed than elsewhere in the film and Borland's vast experience acting on stage and in front of cameras is shining through? (It's also worth noting that although Borland's character of Eddie is the comic relief in the film, he's not as annoying nor stupid as those tend to be in films of this period.)

Another drag on the film is heroic lead Grant Withers. I found him very entertaining in in the Mr. Wong films, but here, aside from his first major scene with co-star Lois Wilson, he is unimpressive and dull. I can't decide if it's the lines he has suffering through, of if it's because he only excels at playing blustery angry characters (like Captain Street in the "Mr. Wong" films) and so fails at more level-headed, low-key characters like the diplomatic and task-focused James Manning in this picture. Since I am primarily familiar with Withers through his role of Captain Street, I can't fairly judge him here. I will have to watch for him elsewhere.)

Ultimately, I think the good--a strong story and a cast of likeable actors--outweighs that bad in "The Secrets of Wu Sin". If you enjoy mysteries from the Poverty Row studios of the early 1930s, I think you'll like this one. You can find it on DVD with the bonus feature "The Law of the Tong" (review coming some day, watch this space!) or streaming on Amazon Prime.

'Wedding Present' is a gift for Cary Grant fans

Wedding Present (1936)
Starring: Cary Grant, Joan Bennett, William Demarest, Edward Brophy, Gene Lockhart, Conrad Nagel, and Purnell Pratt
Director: Richard Wallace
Rating: Six of Ten Stars

Charlie and Rusty (Grant and Bennett) are big-city journalists who are colleagues and lovers who spend as much time tracking down leads and working on stories as they do pulling pranks and staging elaborate practical jokes. When Charlie is promoted to editor, and he suddenly has to be serious about managing writers and assignments, his relationship with Rusty falls apart. It isn't until she's about to marry a stuffy author of self-help books (Nagel) that Charlie quits his new job, reverts to his previous self, and tries to win her back with the help of a notorious gangster (Demarest).

"Wedding Present" is a fast-moving, witty comedy. It's a little too fast-moving in some ways, as the first half of the film feels more like you're watching a series of loosely connected sketches rather than a movie. It put me in mind of some comedy television series, such as "Faulty Towers" or "'Allo, 'Allo" where most episodes unfolded with a series of almost free-standing sketches that were only united by a circumstance which framed them. 

As the film continues, the story begins to coalesce firmly around the rocky romance of Charlie and Rusty. At about the halfway-mark, the film ends up firmly in romantic comedy territory. It's almost like we're watching a sequel to the first half, as this part is comes complete with its own beginning, middle, and end. Some of the "skits" from the first half turn out to be crucial to the story here, but if we'd walked in late, we wouldn't have missed anything, because characters remind us of what went on and why they're doing what they're doing. 

This is not a great movie, but it's not a terrible one. Its odd structure is a bit distracting, but it's not a fatal flaw. In some ways, what I view as a flaw might make it more enjoyable for some viewers, especially those who are big Cary Grant fans.

"Wedding Present" is one of the first films where Grant was unquestionably the star. While Joan Bennett certainly holds an important role in the story, has lots of screen-time--most of it in scenes with Grant--it is Grant who carries the movie. His is the character the audience is primarily invested in, and the story that's ultimately told is that of Charlie's road to life-long happiness (if not maturity). It's also the film where, I feel, that he clearly has come into his own as a comedic screen actor. Thanks partially to the episodic nature of this film's first half, we get to see Grant perform in different comedic styles, playing off different actors and situations... and even being the straight man in a scene or two. 

Cary Grant is so much fun to watch in this film--especially in scenes shared with Joan Bennett (who gives as good as she gets, every single time) and William Demarest (who does a great job at walking the line between seeming funny and dangerous) that I almost gave it Seven Stars. The totality of the odd structure, though, made me decide to give it the highest possible Six Star rating. This is a highly entertaining, but flawed, film that contributes to making the "Cary Grant: Screen Legend Collection" well worth the purchase price. (I've watched three of the five films in the set so far, and each was almost worth the price by itself.)

Oh--a fun way to watch this film is to consider it a prequel to "His Girl Friday". It's very easy to imagine the lead characters from this film being those portrayed by Grant and Rosalind Russell in that one. Maybe you should get both and have a double-feature watch party with friends!

The Coming of Gun Fury!

Gun Fury 1-5 (Aircel Comics/Malibu Graphics, January - May 1989)
Story and Pencils: Barry Blair

Inks and Washes: Dave Cooper

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

In a city where innocent citizens are being preyed upon by the rich and powerful, and by the violent and psychopathic; where the media lies as much as they tell the truth; deluded goofballs can't tell the difference between comic book fantasies and reality, a cry went up for a hero. Gun Fury answered that call... to the regret of many.

"Gun Fury" was a 10-issue series by Barry Blair and Dave Cooper, with the latters artistic style becoming increasingly dominant as the series progressed. Published by Aircel (which was by this time an imprint of Malibu Graphics) from January of 1989 through October 1989.
It featured broad, often crude, satire of the "grim and gritty" comics that were trendy at the time, as well as making fun of fandom and comics industry.

The first five issues are liked by several intertwining storylines and subplots. Along the way, the title character Gun Fury as a demented, ultra-violent hero who's part 1960s Batman and 1980s Punisher. His secret civilian identity is Jack Luger, mild-mannered staff writer at Fan Graphics, a firm that publishes several entertainment-related magazines and comic books. He has a money-grubbing, homophobic boss, and a go-getting investigative journalist female co-worker with a superhero fetish. 

In the first issue, Gun Fury's boy sidekick, Ammo, is killed in a clash with minions of the mysterious Master. Over the next few issues, he adopts and breaks in teenaged orphan Peter Pane as the new Ammo while simultaneously protecting the boy from the Master's agents, including fellow superhero Captain Rearguard who is duped into furthering the evil schemes. Meanwhile, a second more odious threat is lurking in the shadows, preparing to ooze onto the scene. 

Over the course of five issues (which form a complete, self-contained storyline), Blair and Cooper poke fun at superheroes as they were developing in the mid-1980s and into the 1990s... all grim and gritty and violent in the wake hits like "The Watchmen" and "The Dark Knight Returns", with a few dollops of hamfisted social commentary thrown in for  good measure. Perhaps the most clever aspect of Blair's approach to the topic was having the grim-and-gritty co-exist with the lighthearted melodrama and downright goofiness that were the hallmarks of the superhero comics he'd grown up with. It gives a bizarre feeling to Gun Fury's world that is perfect for the title.

What is less perfect is Blair's sense of comedy. While this is an effective spoof in broad strokes, it's less effective when you zoom in. 

First, Blair was just not very good at coming up with one-liners, and the timing is even sometimes off on gags that span panels or pages. His inability to come up with zingers that hit home is particularly obvious when he's trying to play with characters making unintentional double-entendres that are supposed to be plays on sexual activity--homosexual activity in particular. It's particularly painful when it comes to Gun Fury exclaiming "Justice is about to spurt from my loins!" (or some such battle-cries). Some of those kind of jokes made around the superhero suffering from PTSD known as Captain Rearguard work a little better, but not by much.

Second, some of the humor is just too mean-spirited for my tastes--and I'm the guy who produced things like "Bill Clinton Meets a Girl Scout" and "Super Muslim Bros." Reading these comics, it appears that Blair might have hated comics fans, comics retailers, and comics critics in general, and Gary Groth (the founder of Fantagraphics and a key figure in the comics industry when this series was published), since they're all stupid, perverted, gross, and/or money-grubbers who are corrupt to the core. Some of the shots at the comics industry are dead-on, but others just feel like Blair is grinding his personal axes and isn't terribly concerned if he's being funny or not. 

The best of Blair's industry commentary can be found in the scene where the Gary Groth stand-in is berating an editor and a pair of talented hacks for not delivering the promised issues, despite having been paid. The scene ends with the trio heading off to find ANOTHER publisher from whom to get paid for not producing a product. Most of it, though, just feels too venomous and personal to be amusing.

One thing that is of high-caliber and always close to perfect is the art. While not quite at the level of Blair and Cooper's other major collaboration, "Jake Thrash", the combination of Blair's slick, cartoony-with-a-slant-toward-the-manga-style (a decade or more before EVERYONE started doing it) and Cooper's chunky inks and brilliantly applied washes was the perfect visualization for the mixture of old-school superhero posturing married with modern-day gore and violence. The occasional playfulness with the "language" of comic book storytelling that shows up in the art is also very well done. The page below is from "Gun Fury" #1, and it's one of my favorites from the entire series.

Sometimes, when I break out these old comics and re-read them for review purposes, I find myself disappointed; I find that something I have fond memories of doesn't match those memories. That is not the case with "Gun Fury". I had the same reaction to reading it now as I remember having back then--it's fun but flawed. It's got great art and it's a decent spoof of All Things Comics as they stood ca. 1989, but it's dragged down by the writer spewing too much venom in various directions.

Watch this space for thoughts on "Gun Fury" #6 - #10. (Meanwhile, if you have any memories or opinions about "Gun Fury" or any other Aircel Comics, that's what the comments section is for! Also, for an excellent exploration of the man behind the creation, Barry Blair, click here.)

'The Diadem': Emma Peel's Most Secret Mission?

The Diadem (1967? 1968? 1969?)
Starring: Diana Rigg

Director: Uwe Beetz

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

A woman of mystery (Rigg) engages in a deadly struggle with a group of murderous thugs over a secret recording, a piggy bank, and valuable jewelry.

 

Either shortly after she left "The Avengers", or during or shortly after she finished work on "In Her Majesty's Secret Service", Diana Rigg made a pair of made-for-home-viewing short films for a German production company. One of these, "The Diadem" was released both in color (the shorter version, which runs about 7 minutes) and black-and-white (the longer version, which runs about 12 minutes).

The information available about "The Diadem" is long on speculation and short of facts. There are no credits to speak of on the film, so the supporting cast, writer, and crew outside the director are anonymous... and since there only seems to be one source for the director's name, one has to wonder if even that is accurate.

To make matters more complicated, it seems like there are people who may be commenting in authoritative tones about this silent short film who seem to not even have seen it... since they reference events that don't seem to take place in it. (At least not in the version I watched. Maybe the color version isn't just a shortened release of the black-and-white one, but has a different scene or two?

One thing all sources seem to agree upon is that "The Diadem" was made while Rigg's star was shining very brightly during the late 1960s. There is no logical reason for her to star in this weird, ultra-low budget short film. so maybe she did as a favor to a friend? Maybe she had a spare weekend, and she thought it would be fun working with friends? Perhaps, someday, writers and historians more devoted to research and Truth than I will find the answers, but that day is not here.

As for what is actually in "The Diadem", it plays like something of a tribute to "The Avengers", the series where Diana Rigg played Mrs. Emma Peel, the role that catapulted her to fame. One can easily imagine this as a solo adventure for Mrs. Peel, either before, during, or after her gig as a "trouble-shooter" for the British government. Every minute of the film plays like an overly stylized attempt to capture the feel of action scenes from "The Avengers" and the character that Rigg portrays is Mrs. Peel in every way except by name. 

Although for all we know, perhaps we ARE to imagine that this is Emma Peel taking down bad guys and that the filmmakers meant for this to be an authorized sequel to her television adventures... something that hard-core fans could enjoy in their homes on their 8-mm film projectors. The music that plays during the version that watched is even slightly reminiscent of what you might hear on "The Avengers"... although I have no way of knowing if this is what heard when the film was first released.

I think that if you've enjoyed any episodes of "The Avengers", you'll find the "The Diadem" to be a lot of fun. What passes for the plot is a little disjointed and illogical, but the action and weird, artsy choices of camera angles make up for that. The Six Rating I am giving it is as high as it can be, and the only reason it's not a Seven is because the otherwise rapid pacing sputters a bit and is uneven at the halfway mark.

We began 2021 with a look at Emma Peel's first big adventure while she was still a teenager, and we're ending with what could be the last of her adult adventures... bringing The Year of the Avengers to a perfect close.

We hope you have fun watching "The Diadem", and we hope to share another 200-300 posts with you in 2022!

Find some Christmas Cheer with the Little King

Pals (aka "Christmas Night") (1933)
Starring: Anonymous Voice Actor (speaking two lines as Santa Claus)
Director: Jim Tyer

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

The Little King invites a pair of bums back to his palace to share an otherwise lonely Christmas Eve with him. His generosity is rewarded with a magical Christmas Morning brought by Santa himself.

Reportedly, "Pals" is the best-remembered of all the Van Beuren Little King cartoons--perhaps even the only one that's remembered by anyone other than folks who frequent blogs like this one. This is because it used to be aired frequently on American television at Christmas time, under the title "Christmas Night". (Personally, I'd never seen it until I began my project of watching and reviewing the entries in this series.)

As a Christmas Special, it strikes all the right warm-hearted Holiday notes and it's full of cuteness. It's particularly sweet the way the Letter to Santa is read by the Real Thing instead of just a guy in a suit--one of the benefits of living in a cartoon universe, I suppose! I personally would have preferred more of a plotline running through the thing, but the almost random collection of events and scenes are amusing and cute enough that I can look past that.

Two interesting details that stood out to me is the fact that the Little King's queen is such a nasty piece of work that she doesn't even spend Christmas with him. Secondly, it continues to be remarkable to me the way the cartoon's character designs create a distinction and gulfs between the Little King, his servants and ministers, and the common folk of his realm; each group has a distinct look. While I might be prone to chalk that up to the general slipshod approach that was a hallmark of the Van Beuren approach to continuity and quality control, I think it's purposeful in this cartoon and the series in general. The level of details in the backgrounds and the statement by some film historians that Jim Tyer was highly invested in translating "The Little King" newspaper strip to the amination medium with as much respect to the original source material as possible says to me that not only effort but thought was put into every frame. 

But don't just take my word for it. Take a few minutes to check out this classic Christmas celebration; it's bound to bring some cheer! 

(Trivia: "Pals" was released into theaters on December 22, 1933, exactly 88 years prior to this post being made.)

It's the Little King's Day Out

A Royal Good Time (1934)
Starring: Anonymous Voice Actors (but it's basically a silent movie)
Director: Geo. Stallings

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

The Little King heads out for a day at the funfair and ends up causing chaos.

"A Royal Good Time" is one of nine cartoons that the Van Beuren Corporation produced based on "The Little King" comic strip (which ran from 1931 to 1975, ending with the death of its creator and only artist/writer Otto Soglow). Van Beuren licensed The Little King as the strip moved from "The New Yorker Magazine" 

Like many of those adaptations, this one opens with a segment that embodies the look and feel off Soglow's strip, but swiftly veers into territory that's comfortable and typical for the Van Beuren writers and animators: Loosely designed, rubbery characters embroiled in zany, surreal situations and chase scenes full of non-stop sight gags. 

Not unexpectedly, "A Royal Good Time" follows this pattern. The opening plays like a Soglow cartoon put into motion with the Little King heading off to the funfair to use his own rifle at the target game. Once he reaches the fairground, however, the look of the characters change, as does the nature of the story. As I've mentioned before, there is a significant different in the character designs between the Little King and those who work as servants in his palace and in his government, and the common people in the rest of his nation. Those differences in character designs are even more striking here, especially because the Little King has to pass through a "checkpoint" to get into the realm of these commoners (the fairgrounds). Up until watching this installment of the series, I was leaning toward chalking these differences in character designs to the Van Beuren operation wanted to keep a certain look about their cartoons. However, I am coming around to the idea that lead animator Jim Tyre, who reportedly was dedicated to making "The Little King" faithful to Soglow's original strip and the highest quality possible, was actually using character designs to set the king and his court apart from the rest of country and showing how they, essentially exist in different worlds. It's an element that doesn't add a whole lot to the simple and chaotic storylines of the episodes, but I think that I've been giving too little credit to Tyre for his work on this series, which I already thought was pretty good.

All that said, compared to other "The Little King" episodes that Tyre helmed, this one is at the lower end of the quality spectrum. The Carnie/Van Beuren-look characters are a bit unstable in their looks from scene to scene, and the backgrounds aren't quite as well done as in other Tyre efforts (although they are still worlds beyond what is typical in some "Tom and Jerry" episodes. The main chase scene is also initiated by an event that doesn't make any sense--basically, The Little King disrupts a magic act in such a way that I think would be just as impressive to the audience as if it had been executed the right way. Nonetheless, the magician gets angry and proceeds to chase The Little King with a sword, intend on killing him. The ending is also very weak and feels very much like "we don't know how to end this, so here's a bit of surreal silliness that doesn't connect to a darn thing you've just sat through." (I think a straight-up "non-ending" like what we got in "Jolly Good Felons" would have been preferable to how "A Royal Good Time" ends.)

There are things I did like about "A Royal Good Time"--and liked a lot. Several of the sideshow acts The Little King witnesses are vehicles for some funny sight gags, as well as just being clever little story elements all by themselves. The Sword Swallower who put the tip of the sword through to the chair he is sitting might make for a nice real-world magic trick, and the giant who is actually a dozen lilliputians in a trench coat are actually a better act than what they're being passed off as. The mind-reader bit was an old gag when this film was made, but it's still funny the way it's timed and executed here.

If you've got 8 minutes to spare, you could do worse than spending them watching "A Royal Good Time", which I've embedded below for your convenience! Check it out and let me know what you think! 

The Avengers: A Sense of History

A Sense of History (1966)

Starring: Patrick Macnee, Diana Rigg, Patrick Mower, Nigel Stock, John Ringham, and Jacqueline Pearce

Director: Peter Graham Scott

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

John Steed (Macnee) and Emma Peel (Rigg) go undercover at an elite university to find who murdered a leading economist by shooting him in the back with an arrow. They discover a plot to shape the economic future of a united Europe by murdering key politicians and researchers. But which scholars are involved, and who is the mastermind?

I am torn when it comes to this episode. There are things I really like and there are things I can't stand.

On the one hand, I love the set-up and the nature of villains, from how they're characterized, to what motivates them, and through to the plot twists and turns of who the mastermind behind the plot truly is. I also loved the way one cliffhanger resolved into another cliffhanger as the episode reached its climax during a masquerade ball.

On the other hand, the mix of the sinister and the goofy stereotypical Sixties Youth Culture that embodies the student group at the heart of the episode gets tiresome quickly. It becomes downright annoying once it's clear how wrong-headed they are in their destructive beliefs--I just wanted Mrs. Peel to punch each of them in the mouth as soon as it they opened them--but maybe it's a combination of the passage of time and my own worldview that's causing that reaction, or maybe those characters were just supremely annoying. (They're in the same mold as the villains in "A Touch of Brimstone", but far more irritating, partly because their evil here is flavored with wholly undeserved self-righteousness.)

I also felt like the writers wasted too much time on the hipster evil of the young set. This is an episode with a really convoluted plot and a story that is slightly over-stuffed with characters, and some of it doesn't reach its full potential because of the writers belaboring certain social points. 

 

The student group was so annoying to me that I almost rated this episode at the low-end of average (which is a Five of Ten Stars here at Shades of Gray), but as I thought about it, the witty banter between Steed and Peel, plus the Robin Hood puns and sly references scattered throughout, turned my attitude toward "A Sense of History" (even if one of them was a bit forced and nonsensical plot-wise). Emma Peel crossdressing as Robin Hood in short-shorts also went a long way to improving my outlook... 

All things considered, this isn't a terrible episode, but it's far from one of the best. (The end-of-episode gag with Steed and Peel driving off on a motorcycle--with Peel driving and Steed in the sidecar--is, however, among the best of those.)

When horror movies go to the dogs...

... you get a fun little take on so very many of the short films that're featured over at our sister blog Terror Titans.

Horror Movie For Dogs (2020)

Starring: Koda

Director: Caleb Herring

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

A family dog (Koda) is left alone in a haunted house.

 

Filmmaker Caleb Herring wrote about "Horror Movie for Dogs: "I shot this the night before Halloween because I was insanely bored and my girlfriend was out for the night, leaving me and our good boy home alone."

His boredom is our blessing, because this is a nicely done short film. It's concise and not a moment of screen-time is wasted. The only complaint I have is that the soundtrack is a bit overblown and too omnipresent. A little more quiet in this film would have made it a lot more effective.

That aside, this is an amusing effort that is well worth checking out (which you can do from this very post). I think that those people who are down-voting it have no hearts, sense of humor, nor sense of what makes a good film.

The Avengers: The Thirteenth Hole

The Thirteenth Hole (1966)
Starring: Patrick Macnee, Diana Rigg, Patrick Allen, Victor Maddern, and Francis Matthews
Director: Roy Ward Baker
Rating: Five of Ten Stars

When a government agent is murdered, John Steed (Mcnee) and Emma Peel (Rigg) are charged with bringing the guilty parties to justice. Their investigation leads them to an exclusive golf club where a traitor is passing state secrets to the Soviets.

"The Thirteenth Hole" is one of the weaker episodes in Season Four, if not the weakest. The problems are many and severe, and they all originate with the sloppy script.

First, the scheme of the bad guys is complex to the point of ridiculousness. Although I sit down expecting an over-the-top espionage or criminal conspiracy yarn that sometimes is only believable or sensible in the pulp-fictiony, cartoonish universe in which the Avengers exist, what I got in this episode was so over the top that it didn't even work as a spoof of the 1960s spy movies where bad guys had elaborate secret hideouts in the weirdest places. Maybe I could have been more forgiving if the script had been better.

Second. something needed better editing here, be it the script or the final product. The story just doesn't hold together, even by the sometimes fast-and-loose logical standards of "The Avengers". This is mostly because characters who seem significant are introduced, only to vanish without further development or explanation, but it occurs to me that maybe that wouldn't have bothered me so much if the characters that do stick around were more interesting. No one seems particularly menacing or amusing... even some comedic antics by Steed on the golf course fall flat.

One saving grace of the episode is that director Roy Ward Baker kept things moving as quickly as possible--perhaps a little too quickly, as touch on above--but that still doesn't make up for the lameness of the characters and the writing in general. Second, there's a gun that fires golf balls' I really like this idea, and it was perfect for causing "accidental deaths" on a golf course. (Well, except for when the dimwitted bad guys star shooting people with it after the course is closed and in the middle of the night.)

All in all, a disappointing outing for the Avengers.... but they can't all be good when you're on the grueling schedule of episodic television.

A moment with a pervert

Toothy Smile (1957)
Starring: Nikola Todorow
Director: Roman Polanski
Rating: Six of Ten Stars

A man (Todorow) going out for the evening stops to ogle his topless neighbor, but learns he should have stopped while he was ahead.

"Toothy Smile" is a short film made by Roman Polanski while he was at film school in Poland. It's a silent film, although there is one moment where it really needed sound (or at least a shot including a different angle on the action). 

It runs just shy of two minutes, so it will take almost no time at all for you to check it out--it's well worth it. My summary might make it sound a little more dramatic than it actually is, but everything here shows that Polanski had excellent mastery of cinematic storytelling from the beginning.

Note: Tuesdays in August of 2021, there'll be a review of one of Roman Polanski's short films at this blog. This is in observation of his 88th birthday, which is on the 18th. While he may be a shitty human being (what with him being a convicted child rapist who refuses to face punishment for his crime), he's made some pretty good films that are worth checking out.

Koko's off the rails while driving the crazy train

KoKo's Toot-Toot (aka"Toot-Toot") (1926, re-released 1950)
Starring: Max Fleischer
Director: Dave Fleischer

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

While traveling by train, the Animator (Fleischer) doodles in his sketch book. His drawings of KoKo the Clown and his pet dog come to life, and soon they are causing train-based havoc in both the animated and real worlds.

"KoKo's Toot-Toot" is another tale where animated characters escape their two-dimensional world to cause chaos in ours. It's not the best I've seen of this series--there are several sequences that go on for just long enough to stop being amusing--but it does have its high points. My favorite bit is where KoKo, after disassembling the sketch of a non-operational train and putting it back together again all wrong but now working, as well as much of the train-ride that follows.

A common weakness that all the Out of the Inkwell shorts seem to share is a lack of a satisfying close to the films. That is mostly the case here, too, but it is also so surrealistic that I can't help but give the filmmakers points for thinking big.

I've embedded the film below for your convenience and viewing pleasure. I believe the version I watched (and featured here) is the one that was aired on Australian television, with added sound effects and soundtrack. I felt the music got a bit tiresome as it looped through the same tune for the third or fourth time toward the end, but you're mileage and tolerance for such things may be higher than mine. I actually found myself wondering if someone has put this 'toon to "Crazy Train" by Ozzy Obourne--which in turn led to finding the "bonus" I've included at the bottom of the post. (Yes, it's two-for-one day here at Shades of Gray!)

And here's a bonus--Ozzy Osbourne's "Crazy Train" performed by cartoon characters!

Felix goes the distance in search of 'False Vases'

False Vases (1929)
Starring: Anonymous Voice Actors (although no sensible lines are spoken)
Director: Otto Messmer
Rating: Six of Ten Stars

After his wife's favorite vase is broken, Felix the Cat (who is fearful of her wrath) goes all the way to China to get a replacement.

If there ever was a text book example of doing something the hard way--even in a cartoon universe--than this is it... even if Felix cleverly tricks a dog into digging him a hole all the Earth so he can get to China. It's a cute execution of a joke that was probably old when this film was made. 

And "cute" is the byword for everything in this cartoon, with a cartoonish surrealism dose. There's not much here that will make you go "wow", but it's a solid piece of fluffy entertainment without any spectacular highs but also without anything that's so bad it's worth calling out. I don't think it's "False Vases" age that makes me say that, I think audiences in 1929 would say the same thing: Whether you compare it to previous Felix the Cat cartoons, or to some of the other fare available around the same time, this Felix adventure is nice, but nothing spectacular.

From a purely personal standpoint, there are two minor factors that drag "False Vases" down. First, there's my basic dislike of Felix when he's causing chaos unprovoked and just generally being a trickster for no solid reason; we're given a little of that here, so my reaction to a few of the sequences are equal parts amusement and annoyance. Second, there's a strangely recurring gag/theme of Felix turning human beings into musical instruments and playing them. I suspect the bits are there because this was reportedly the first Felix cartoon was was made with sound in mind (instead of being retrofit with a soundtrack as many of them were), but a little less repetition would have been nice. (Some modern viewers might also gasp with outrage and horror and need some time on the fainting couch due to some of the character designs, but I think those would be in the tiny minority of people interested in old cartoons like this, of which an even tinier fraction would be looking at this blog. Personally, I see them as cartoon characters living in a cartoon version of China, and they are no more or less rediculous or offensive or insensitive than other human characters that appear in the various Felix cartoons. I feel a little silly even commenting on it, but it also feels like a necessity these days.)

"False Vases" is one of ten Felix the Cat cartoons included on the "Felix the Cat: Early Cartoon Classics" from Alpha Video. It's the latest collection curated by film preservationist and lecturer John Carpenter, and it's got some rarities on it you won't find easily elsewhere. Even if you do find them, they're not likely to be in as good condition, nor as complete, as the ones featured on this disc.

Take for example the version of "False Vases" that's available on YouTube (embedded below, so you can sample Felix if you want to) versus the one of the DVD. The latter has a much sharper picture.

But I recommend getting the Carpenter/Alpha Video's "Felix the Cat" collection. It's fun stuff as a VERY reasonable price!

In anticipation of the new "Cinderella" film...

... we're going to bring you some black-and-white adaptations of that famous fairy tale (along with commentary). You may also treat these posts as a public service if you don't have access to Amazon Prime (where the new "Cinderella" will premiere on September 3), or if you want to be able to say you've seen "Cinderella", but don't want to sit through 90+ minutes of sap.

First up, we have TerryToon's adaptation of "Cinderella" from 1933. Drop down to the end of post and click to watch it. Although you can also read our thoughts on it first... and then maybe you can leave some thoughts of your own in the comments section below this post!

Cinderella (1933)

Starring: Anonymous Voice Actors

Director: Frank Moser

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

A hedonistic king throws a party while his stern queen is out of town. Cinderella's ugly stepsisters are invited while she has to stay at home... but she ends up at the festivities anyway.

 

To say this is a loose adaptation of the familiar "Cinderella" story is an understatement. It begins in familiar territory and then transforms into something completely different. The creators seem to kinda-sorta remember what they were doing every now and then--a "Cinderella" adaptation--but only momentarily.

After opening with one of most annoying songs you're likely to encounter, but very much on track to be a standard "Cinderella" tale, it then it goes spinning off in bizarre directions. Cinderella is almost a minor character in her own story, with most of the focus being on the lecherous king, his dippy son, and the drunken bash the king throws. Some of the expected elements show up, but they are strange and surreal distortions of what we'd typically expect. 

Are you in the mood for something weird? Sit back and enjoy this wild ride, along with a king on his tricycle, a prince on his wooden horse, and Cinderella in her magic carriage.

Don't litter or the Mask Man will get you!

Mask Man (2021)

Starring: AJ Ashok

Director: AJ Ashok

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

A litter bug (Ashok) has a bizarre and life-altering encounter.

While I was annoyed by the self-important Mask Nazis roaming around forcing their obsession with face masks on the rest of us over the past year-and-a-half, I was REALLY pissed off by those damn masks were strewn in parking lots and on sidewalks everywhere. because the pigs who had worn them were too lazy to dispose of them properly in a trash can. I hope that the Mask Nazis and their filthy habits are well behind us now.

When I first came across AJ Ashok's short silent horror film "Mask Man", I hoped that he'd made a film about some supernatural terror would haunt a Mask Nazi who was also a pig and just threw their disposable masks on the ground instead of in the trash. Alas, it is not my revenge fantasy brought to the screen, but it is an interesting little anti-littering film. (Even if I come to the conclusion that Ashok must live in a strange place... or do adults really carry snack-sized bags of crisps and juice boxes with them while out for a stroll?)

Click below to enjoy Ashok's moody little film. And remember: Don't litter.

The Avengers: Silent Dust

Silent Dust (1965)
Starring: Patrick Macnee, Diana Rigg, William Franklyn, Jack Watson, Isobel Black, Joanna Wake, Charles Lloyd Pack
Director: Roy Ward Baker
Rating: Five of Ten Stars

An investigation into the use of a banned pesticide puts a pair of government agents (Macnee and Rigg) in the crosshairs of a group of land owners intending to blackmail the British government.

The best things I can say about "Silent Dust" is that it never gets boring--one can almost always rely on Roy Ward Baker to keep things moving--and Steed has some funny exchanges with a scientist he consults during the investigation (played by Charles Lloyd Pack, who perhaps Great Britain's hardest working bit-player during the 1950s and 1960s.). Diana Rigg also has some amusing lines when Peel is expressing opinions about the episode's villains to Steed... but they are nowhere near as witty as what can found found in other episodes.

What is also better in many other episodes is the villains. Not only are the ones in "Silent Dust" mostly bland, but their scheme is absolute nonsense and one that had no chance of success (or even resulting in long-term benefit to the villains if anyone had bothered to think things through). And yeah... that's how bad it is--I am complaining about something in an episode of "The Avengers" that doesn't make sense.... 

One interesting aspect of the show is how fox hunting figures in the show, even if it becomes a bit lame toward the end. It's one of the many times when the societal changes that were shaking the long-standing British class system and gender roles in the mid-1960s. It's also one of the reasons that this episode is still worth watching today--it's something of a historical artifact.

Ko-Ko vs. the Spider-Creature!

Trapped (1923)

Starring: Max Fleischer

Director: Dave Fleischer

Rating: Six of Ten Stars

After a disagreement about how urgent it is to deal with a mouse in the studio, the Animator (Fleischer) draws a monstrous spider-creature to put Ko-Ko the Clown in his place.

"Trapped" is another fun mix of live action footage and animation, with the fourth wall disintegrating between our world and the animated one. As is often the case, Max the Animator and his creation, Ko-Ko, are at odds over something, but Max seems extra petty this time around. (Watching this one will make you appreciate Ko-Ko's actions better in "The Cartoon Factory".)

When I first watched this "Trapped", I thought Ko-Ko's actions were as badly motivated as the Animator's hostility toward him; Ko-Ko's desire to see that rodent dealt with seemed a bit much--even considering that they're smelly, disease-carrying animals--but then it occurred to me that the mouse was chewing on cardboard and paper, and that Ko-Ko's entire world exists on a foundation of paper. From Ko-Ko's point of view that mouse more than just an annoyance, but something that can literally destroy his world and possibly end his existence. This makes the Animator's reaction seem all the more mean-spirited.

Of course, I could also be overthinking the whole thing, and it's nothing more than the tale of a cartoon clown worrying about a rodent infestation while fighting for his life against a bowler hat-wearing giant spider. Why don't you give me YOUR take after clicking below and spending a few minutes watching some silent movie era cartoon weirdness?