Space Girl Adventures, Part Twenty-two

What Has Gone Before: Spacegirl is trying to get off Delta Moon Station before those on her trail catch up to her.

SPACEGIRL

By Travis Charest

To Be Continued...

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In a change of pace from closing this installment with the just the usual Retro-Space Girl drawing, here are the adventures of another Space Girl-- a bonus series from Ramen Empire.

By Bob Layton

That time Betty Boop went to Hell...

Red Hot Mamma (1934)
Starring: Bonnie Poe (as the voice of Betty Boop)
Director: Dave Fleischer
Rating: Ten of Ten Stars

When Betty Boop accidentally opens a gate to Hell, she decides to check the place out.

"Red Hot Mamma" is one of the greatest Betty Boop cartoons ever made; heck, it might be one of the greatest cartoons, period. Hell has never been jazzier and funnier than it is here: Even the initiations of new demons into the infernal ranks is a laff riot! It was also one of the last of the truly "risqué" ones, as the Hayes Office hammer was about to come down on the Fleischer Studios and the rest of Hollywood.

In fact, "Red Hot Mamma" as so "risqué" that it was banned by Great Britain's film censorship board in 1934, not because of sexiness but because they considered the lighthearted portrayal of Hell to be blasphemous. Maybe it's the fact that I'm not terribly religious, maybe its 85 years of eeeevil cultural decay, but I don't see the blasphemy here. If anything, the film makes a point about how the pure of heart can resist and overcome evil, since the film shows Betty to be the baddest Good Girl there is when she responds to devils who are happy to see her ("Hiya Betty!") with a shoulder so cold--and such a frigid stare--that Hell literally freezes over! (There's another element to Betty's trip to Hell that makes this ban even more of a head-scratcher for me, but to talk about it would really ruin the fun for you when watching it.)

But what do you think? Did this cartoon deserve to be banned by the British Board of Film Distribution? I've embedded it in this very post, for you to enjoy the sleek animation, nifty music, and hilarious sight gags--right here, right now.

'Cheating Blondes' can safely be avoided

Cheating Blondes (aka "Girls in Trouble") (1933)
Starring: Thelma Todd, Ralf Harolde, Milton Wallis, Gilbert Frayle, Inez Courtney, Dorothy Gulliver, Mae Busch, and Brooks Benedict
Director: Joseph Levering
Rating: Six of Ten Stars

After her would-be rapist is shot, Anne Merrick (Todd) assumes the identity of her missing twin sister, Elaine (also Todd), to avoid being charged with murder. Meanwhile, her rejected newspaper reporter would-be husband (Harolde) is devoting every waking moment to see her captured, tried, and executed.

"Cheating Blondes" has some interesting issues at its core--domestic abuse and the problems that arise in society when women are treated as if they have less value than men. There is literally not a male character in the film who doesn't view women as things that are to be counted among their possessions, or treated as commodities, and there isn't a female character who doesn't suffer in some way because of it. There's also a hint of a murder mystery in the film... and it may have been more than a hint, or less of a mystery, if I'd been able to watch the entire film.

Unfortunately, there is a complete reel missing in the copy that's available on DVD, and it's a chunk of the film that contains a whole lot of plot that explains how Anne made contact with her sister's agent Mike Goldfish (Milton Wallis) and personal trainer Polly (Inez Courtney) and assumed her sister's identity with their knowledge and blessing; explains the connection between the agent and sister Elaine's weathy admirer Gilbert Frayle (Earl McCarthy); establishing a mystery around who actually shot the wife-beating, would-be rapist (Brooks Benedict); and further expands on the evidence that Ralf Harolde's reporter character is an absolute prick.

At least I assume that all those things happen in the 12 or so missing minutes, because, if they don't, then this is one of most disjointed, badly developed films of all time. There might even be something in there to make the title make sense, because right now, this film has a distinct lack of "cheating blondes". (In all seriousness, SOME or all of things must have been covered, because even the worst screenwriter and director in the world would have set up the developments that happen later in the film to at least a small degree, instead of having them drop on the confused viewer.)

That missing chunck of the film--a very key chunk--makes it hard to evaluate this film, because I really can't be sure to what degree my assumptions are right or wrong. For example, while watching the film, I was convinced that the manager had murdered Anne's sister, Elaine, because she was dropping him as an agent, but this turns out to be wrong assumption. Likewise, I suspect Mae Busch's and Ralf Harolde's character's got more development, because their behavior in the second half of the film seems like it needed more set-up than what is here. The same is true of some of the film's ending. Depending on what was in that missing piece, my rating could be one Star higher or lower... but I doubt I'll ever know what I missed.

While what there is here gets off to a slightly shakey start--Thelma Todd is quite terrible in the scene she has with Dorothy Gulliver, lending more credence to my theory that her performance is greatly impacted by whom she's playing off--but it quickly picks up, as everyone else is pretty decent. Even Todd is better in her later scenes, including one with Gulliver, so the movie is worth sticking with. Evenmoreso, this is an interesting bit of film due to its very stark treatment of sexism and misogny. Sexism, and even spousal abuse, is something that's just part of the fabric of life in many of these films from 1930s--because it probably was just a part of the fabric of life--but in "Cheating Blondes", treating women like objects or somehow lesser people is very much presented as a negative: It gets one characer killed and it literally ruins an otherwise successful career of another character. Meanwhile, the male character who recognizes that his presumptious and demanding behavior toward Todd's character Anne is unreasonable and uncivilized, and apologizes for and corrects his behavior, gets to enjoy a happy ending.

"Cheating Blondes" is available on DVD with "Cheers of the Crowd", a movie that isn't missing any pieces, but which also isn't all that good. If "Cheating Blondes" does sound interesting to you, I recommend you view it at one of several free online sources.

'Timeless' is a sweet modern-day silent film

Timeless (2013)
Starring: Joel Feitler and Candice Dayton
Director:  Micah Mahaffey
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars

A young genius (Feitler) builds a time machine in order to prevent the death of his wife (Dayton).

"Timeless" is a silent short film that isn't a century or so old; as of this writing, it's not even a decade since it was made. Micah Mahaffey wrote and directed a small number of silent short films back in the early 2010s, and if any of the others are as good as this one, I'll probably write about and embed them in this space.

The most impressive thing about this film is that Mahaffey tells a complete story in under three minutes. I have watched a lot of short films over the past few years, and more often than not, filmmakers present vignettes rather than giving us something with a beginning, middle, and end. Here, we are treated to all the niceties you'd expect from a well-crated tale--including a denoument!

I was also impressed by the fact that Mahafferey clearly understood the limitations of his budget and resources, and he worked within them to pull off some nice special effects. He could have easily overreached and given us something that looked cheesy. Instead, he gave us something that looked just right.

The only negative points I can raise about the film is that I didn't quite buy the notion that the grieving widower seemed too young to build a time machine--it seemed like something that would have taken him a decade or more (at least), not just three years. Another thing I didn't quite like was the organ music score. It wasn't that the music was bad... it was that it was an organ. (I think I understand the reasons for both of these negatives. The first goes back to Mahaffey working with the resources he had available, and as a young filmmaker, it's natural he would a young cast to draw on so the time machine had to be invented within a short timespan. As for the second... well, it is a silent movie, so why use organ music? However, I think this story would have  been better served by a grand piano.)

I recommend taking a few minutes to check out "Timeless" for yourself. I hope you like it as much as I did.

When setting off Fourth of July Fireworks...

... do NOT follow the example set by Betty Grable.

Happy Independence Day to the U.S.A.

Little Known Fourth of July Fact:

Dancer and actress Cyd Charisse is why
fireworks are now labeled with safety warnings.

Getting ready for the Fourth of July!

U.S. Flags? Check!
Star-spangled Shorts? Check!
Fireworks and More Fireworks? Check!

Lilian Bond is ready to celebrate Independence Day! How about you?

Musical Monday with Holly Macve

"The Corner of My Mind" is a song with beautiful, haunting lyrics and a visually fascinating video... it's country-western music by way of Yorkshire, England, and brought to us by Holly Macve.

I think even if you don't usually like country-western music, you may like this song. Take a listen!



And here are some pictures of Ms. Macve, because posting pictures are one of things I do around here! (And you can read more about her, here.)

'Ring Up the Curtain' has Harold Lloyd bringing down the house

Ring Up the Curtain (1919)
Starring: Harold Lloyd, Bebe Daniels, Harry Pollard, Bud Jamison, and William Blaisedell
Director: Alf Goulding
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars

An incompetent stage hand (Lloyd) gets the hots for a flirtatious leading lady (Daniels) and ruins a performance as a result.

"Ring Up the Curtain" is a fun little tale that demonstrates the importance of having a good backstage crew supporting the performers on stage... because all the complications in this picture arise from the bad choices made by a theatre owner (William Blaisdell) in hiring a bunch of drunks. He compounds his error by firing them all, except for one, as a troupe of vaudevillians are about to put on a performance. His catastrophic mistakes are to our benefit, however, as the chaos Harold the Useless Stagehand is hilarious to watch.

The film isn't perfect, though. After a strong start, featuring the sacking of the drunken stagehands, about a minute is wasted on the theatre owner abusing Harold and some shtick with a bowler hat that drags on for too long. Once Bebe Daniels and the rest of the acting troupe shows up, the film gets back on target.

The good outweighs the bad here, though. The scene were Harold out-and-out sexually harasses Bebe Daniels in the middle of the performance and ends up on stage fighting with her husband (played by Harry Pollard) is already comedy gold, but it's made even funnier by the way Harold forces an actor practicing his lines to hold the rigging ropes in the wing.

But don't just take my word for how fun this little movie is; I've made it easy for you to check it out by embedding it below, via YouTube.

'Show Business' is full of funny business

Show Business (1932)
Starring: ZaSu Pitts, Thelma Todd, Anita Garvin, Monte Collins, and Otto Fries
Director: Jules White
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars

A pair of vaudevillians and their singing monkey (Pitts and Todd) get a last minute gig as a replacement act in a touring show. Things start to go wrong even before they set foot on stage, as they end up at odds with the show's ego-maniacal star (Garvin).

At the center of "Show Business" is a professional lifestyle that was coming to an end by the 1930s--that of a member of a traveling variety show that criss-crossed the nation on any number of theatrical circuits. Muscians, chorus girls, actors, and comedians... all would travel together from engagement to engagement, essentially spending their lives on the road (or, more specifically, on the train tracks). Headliners would often be fixed, but smaller acts would drop in and drop out, which is where our heroines enter the picture

After a weak beginning that should have just been used to set up the monkey and the excuse for later showing viewers Thelma Todd walking around in a hat and her underwear, but which is crippled by Pitts doing some unfunny prop comedy involving a telephone and a half-eaten apple, followed by a just-as-unfunny bit involving a dresser drawer, the film really takes off. From the moment the action changes to the train station, and we're introduced to the film's antagonists, Anita Garvin and her manager Monte Collins, through to the final fade-out, we are treated to hilarious chaos and some fine comedic acting.

In "Show Business", Thelma Todd gets to show off what made her such a fantastic screen actress (and I'm taking about the skimpy outfit she's almost not wearing in the pseudo-catfight at the train station). There are multiple in this picture where her face says everything that's going through the character's mind, and just watching Todd's facial expressions change (as she goes from confused to angry, or self-righteously indignant to embarrassed) provide some of the film's funniest moments.

Anita Garvin also shines in this picture, playing a variant of the shrewish wife she'd portray in several Laurel & Hardy pictures, but here the main target of her ire is her manager played by Monte Collins while Todd and Pitts and their mon inadvertently make both their lives very difficult. It's a common in these kinds of shorts to see self-important characters be humiliated by the bumbling clowns with whom the audience's sympathies rests, and Garvin is so good at playing an obnoxious, self-entitled primadonna that her unraveling is extra satisfying. Meanwhile, Collins occupies an interesting place in the configuration of characters, swinging from threat to our heroines to an almost ally, as he tries to get them settled in the train so he can be spared any more abuse from Garvin.

The only disappointing member of the main cast here is ZaSu Pitts, but I don't think it's her fault. For the most part, she was stuck doing unfunny prop comedy, and her fidgety character seemed out of place surrounded by all the loud, overly theatrical types that occupy the rest of the film. That said, she had a couple shining moments in the part of the film at the train station, as she is trying to convince a police officer (Otto Fries) why it's a bad idea for him to make Thelma take off her coat; and later after she and Thelma wake everybody up on a sleeping car while trying to get into their bunk themselves.

Despite its weak opening, and a couple minor hiccups along the way (there is a point where some time must pass between scenes, but there's no indication of it, so the film feels a bit disorganized for few moments) "Show Business" is a fun entry in the Todd/Pitts series of comedies that benefits both for a strong script and the fact that most of its cast is in parts that let them play to their strengths as performers. (Although it's a shame that we never get to hear the monkey sing.

"Show Business" is one of 17 shorts contained in a two DVD set that features all of the films Thelma Todd and ZaSu Pitts made together.