The Swank Quarterly

 Yesterday, we were thankful. Today, we are grateful... for Hilary Swank being able to demonstrate the Unifying Theme of Shades of Gray.

Secret History... Revealed!

 Before settling on The Bunny as the symbol for his adult entertainment franchise, Hugh Hefner considered The Turkey, along with the slogan "We're Thankful for the Birds!"

The Avengers: How to Succeed... at Murder

How to Succeed... at Murder (1966)
Starring: Diana Rigg, Patrick Macnee, Christopher Benjamin, and Sarah Lawson

Director: Don Leaver

Rating: Seven of Ten Stars

A secret society of personal assistants are making themselves indispensable to the company the work for, then murdering top executives they assist and being promoted to their positions. John Steed (Macnee) and Emma Peel (Rigg), the goverment's top trouble-shooters are assigned to find evidence of the society's existence, determine who's behind it, and bring them to justice.

"How to Succeed... at Murder" is the third or fourth time that the Avengers have had to unravel a plot targeting Britain's corporate leaders and captains of industry, but the "women's lib" angel to this one made it feel fresh. There is also a very well executed twist--one that is subtly set up early in the episode--that was ahead of its time and gives the episode a more modern feel that many of the episodes.

This is another episode where the Avengers run their investigation on two tracks that are separate but which intersect and criss-cross as they unfold: While Steed sets himself up as a target for the secret society by hiring someone believed to be connected to it as his personal assistant, Mrs. Peel infiltrates the group to discover their secrets from the inside. Naturally, things don't go as smoothly as they might have hoped for, but we the viewers get to see Emma Peel taking on a mob of female assassins who, like her, are trained in hand-to-hand combat.

Despite the slightly repetitious nature of the threat, this episode is mostly a fun one. It's full of eccentric and interesting characters and the banter and witticisms exchanged between Steed and Peel, and between Steed & Peel and their friends and foes are all cute or clever. 

Unfortunately, the show falls apart a bit toward the end. Despite the clever twist/Big Reveal referred to above, the episode is dragged down a bit by the villains suddenly seeming very, very stupid, despite having been presented as very intelligent up until the finale. I also have a minor quibble with Emma Peel even being able to infiltrate the group, given that she should actually be quite famous in business circles (established canonically in "The House That Jack Built"). That same disconnect also makes Steed's comments to Peel about how women shouldn't be left in charge of important business seem either insulting or inexplicably sarcastic, since she was once in charge, and still the owner of, a multinational corporation.

"How to Succeed... at Murder" has its flaws, but the good outweighs  the bad, making it an above average entry in the series.

On a side note related to another topic of this blog, I found myself wondering whether this episode of "The Avengers" was a primary source of inspiration for one of the quirky villains in Richard Sala's magnum opus "Mad Night"--not to mention partly informing the many leotard-clad female assassins that pop up all throughout his work. (Which reminds me... I really have to get around to making that blog post about the Brigitte Bardot/Richard Sala/"The Chuckling Whatsit" connection. And, for that matter, reviewing both "Mad Night" and "The Chuckling Whatsit"!) 

Happy birthday, Christina Applegate!

Christina Applegate was a child actress who first found fame as Kelly Bundy, the dumb blonde daughter on the hit subversive sit-com "Married... With Children". The show ran from 1987 to 1997, and as she grew up before our eyes, Applegate also successfully leaped the gap that so many kid performers  can't bridge and continued her successful career into adulthood.

Aside from her role on "Married... With Children", Applegate is perhaps best known for her starring turns in series such as "Jesse" (1998 - 2000), "Samantha Who?" (2007 - 2009) and her current series "Dead to Me", which is on Netflix. On the Big Screen, she led the cast in "Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead" (1991) and shined in a supporting role in both "Anchorman" films, and in a favorite here at Shades of Gray, "Employee of the Month" (2007). And these are just a few of what you'll find on her still-growing list of credits.

Christina Applegate turns 50 today. We're celebrating this milestone with pictures... and we're thankful for the entertainment she's provided for us over the years!

 

Princesses of Mars, Part 39

It's Thanksgiving in the U.S. tomorrow, and the Princesses of Mars stand ready to carve up the turkey (and whoever looks at them funny).

Musical Monday with U2

U2 was one of the biggest bands of the 1980s and 1990s. I have a sense that people either love or hate them. Personally, I like some of their hit songs, and I can't stand others. Today's selection falls into the "like" category, and the same is true of the very interesting video that was made to promote it, when it became the fourth and final single off the 1988 album "Rattle and Hum".

All I Want Is You (1989)

Starring: Paolo Risi and Paola Rinaldi

Director: Meirt Avis

Rating: Nine of Ten Stars

A dwarf circus ringmaster (Risi) pines for the love of a beautiful trapeze artist (Rinaldi)

As is befitting the beautiful, romantic, yet somehow still haunting, song "All I Want Is You", the promotional video that was made in support of the single featuring it. I kept expected the story here to take a "Freaks"-like turn--especially with the hint that the female trapeze artist may be in an abusive relationship with her handsome lover--but that never happens. Instead, we get a mysterious, magical twist and a sad ending. I don't know what quite to make of either, but it's cool, it supports the music, and it's fun to think about what might have happened. All that adds up to me not having any complaints... although I do have a few more thoughts to bring up. I'll do that below the video, so as to keep to my self-imposed rule of not posting "spoilers" around here.

Okay... so at the end of "All I Want Is You". the object of the dwarf's love has died, presumably falling from the trapeze. I know there's apparently controversy about that inperperation, and as the video was unfolding, I thought is was the dwarf who had fallen to his death as well, but that doesn't work. First, the coffin being carried is too big, and, second, why would the now-ghostly dwarf throw the ring he'd purchased into the grave? A bigger question, though, is what does the flying sequence mean? It's very interesting, but if the dwarf didn't fall from the trapeze, then what's that flying bit all about?

If anyone can enlighten me, please leave a comment below. (The same is true if you just think I'm thinking too hard.)

And for what it's worth--I think the trapeze artist was murdered by her overly jealous and possessive lover. He made it look like an accident, but he did in fact murder her. The dwarf and his strongman friend discover, and they take revenge in some sort of gruesome and poetic fashion which I'm sure I could work out if I wanted to apply myself! (That said, maybe it was the dwarf who killed her; he climbed up and sabotaged the trapeze, thus freeing himself from his unrequited love? I like the other notion better though.)

Bones Coffee's Salty Siren and S'morey Time

Today, we bring you another double-feature coffee review post--because we're all revved up on caffeine here! Both of today's reviews were based on Bones Coffee's pre-ground, 4-oz. sample packs of medium-roast, flavored blends made from Brazilian Arabica beans.

Lauren Bacall: The perfect hostess for today's reviews.

BONES COFFEE COMPANY: SALTY SIREN

In this piece, I talked about my love for salted caramel coffees. When I discovered that Bones Coffee had a second salted caramel-flavored blend, I had to get myself a pack to see if Salty Siren measured up to the basic Salted Caramel blend.

The Salty Siren package (which sports another very cool Bones cartoon) promises coffee flavored with sea salt, caramel, and chocolate (a "sea salt caramel mocha" flavor, to be precise)... and that is what it delivers. You can smell the caramel when you open the package and as the coffee is brewing, but when you drink it, there's a saltiness and dark chocolate flavor that dominates, along with that of coffee.

The coffee flavor, mixed with the dark chocolate, produces more of an edge than was present in the Salted Caramel blend, so I liked this much better when I added some sugar-free Italian Sweet Cream creamer (unlike the case with Salted Caramel where I was perfectly happy drinking it uncut. Unsweetened vanilla almond milk to mixed especially well with the existing flavors, bringing the saltiness and chocolate flavors to the fore even stronger.

Drinking this blend iced was like a highly salty version of Salted Caramel; the chocolate taste vanished completely and the saltiness became very dominant.

I personally prefer Salted Caramel over the Salty Siren blend, but if you want your salted caramel with a strong salty taste that lingers on your lips as you drink the coffee, this would be the blend to go with.

BONES COFFEE COMPANY: S'MOREY TIME

The S'morey Time blend is one of those Bones Coffee selections that I was attracted to more because of the picture on the package than any expectation I'd like it, or curiosity about the flavor. (I hoped I'd like it, of course, but I had very little in the way of preconceived notions going in.)

First, I've never actually had s'mores. I wasn't raised in the U.S. or Canada, so, although I've been camping or otherwise sat around fires and told stories, I've not made s'mores. I've toasted marshmallows, but not sandwiched between crackers and chocolate. I think I may have led a deprived childhood.

Although I am not sure exactly what S'morey Time was supposed to taste like, I enjoyed drinking this a lot. It's also one those delightful Bones Coffee offerings that filled my kitchen and office with a tasty aroma as the coffee brewed--it was the unmistakable smell of marshmallows this time! That same smell drifted up from the mug as I filled it, and it was the foremost flavor--blended smoothly and sweetly with great taste of Bones's medium-roasted Brazilian beans. There was also a smoky flavor that definitely brought a campfire to mind, together with a hint of chocolate. These flavors remained steady when I drank it over ice.

S'morey Time is also one of those Bones Coffee blends that is so sweet- and mellow (marshmallow)-tasting that I could have consumed it without adding any almond milk or creamer. However, unsweetened almond milk and unsweetened almond milk with vanilla mixed well with the flavors without detracting or weakening them all that much, aside from making the coffee's edge even blunter. (In fact, the coffee flavor vanished almost completely when I added the almond milk.)

I did not like this blend when I added the sugar-free Italian Sweet Cream creamer, whether I was drinking it hot or over ice. It simply became too sweet to my liking.

As far as Bones Coffee selections go, this one is grouped with Peaches and Screams (which, coincidentally, I also happened to cover in the second spot in a two-for-one review post), as a very sweet drink where the coffee flavor is almost erased by the others. The flavors are not as overwhelming as in Peaches and Screams, so if you like your coffee sweet but still tasting like coffee this is a blend to go with. I also really liked the smoky taste that lingered while I consumed this.

Lauren Bacall had to light a cigarette to get that smoky flavor with her coffee.
Too bad she couldn't have gotten a cup of S'morey Time!

I have to add that this was also one of those Bones Coffee blends that appealed to me because of the cartoon on package. I loved the idea of the company mascot toasting marshmallows with a Big Foot and a werewolf while telling ghost stories around a campfire, so it got added to the list of coffees to try to see if I'd love the flavor, too. 

The Mystery of Ninecrow must be revealed!

While researching something entirely different, I stumbled upon the series "Ninecrow" by Dora Mitchell.

"Ninecrows" is a serialized webcomic that Mitchell began in October of 2020. It has the tone and pacing of a young adult horror novel, or a high-quality made-for-TV psychological thriller. It's the story of Amanda, a teenager who moves to an isolated small town with her Mom, following her parents divorce. She soon discovers that there is something very odd about the place, including strange lights in the wooded mountains high above the town and a pattern of girls mysteriously disappearing when they are about her age. When her mother starts to undergo a personality change, Amanda tries finding allies that can help her unravel the mysteries of the town--but is there anyone or any thing what is at it seems in this strange town?

As of this writing, Mitchell's about 100 pages in and is currently serializing the fourth and final chapter. So far, I've loved how the story's unfolded and how Mitchell has been upping the stakes and laying on the mystery and dialing up the horror. I am looking forward to seeing how it all wraps up, especially given the completely new mystery that was introduced in the something-of-a-cliffhanger ending of Part Three.

I have read the three completed chapters. I generally don't comment on these sorts of web serials (or comic book storylines, period) until they're complete and I can evaluate the entire work. In this case, though, I am interested enough in what's going on that I want to see Mitchell encouraged to finish it! And what better encouragement it there than to know there's an audience out there?

Go check out "Ninecrows". You can read the completed parts, thus experiencing the series the way I did, by clicking on the links below:

Part One -- Part Two -- Part Three

Or you can read the tale as it unfold, one page at a time, by clicking here.

The Avengers Dossier, Page Twenty-three

Throughout the year, we've been providing mini-bios of actors who have appeared on episodes of "The Avengers" that've been reviewed in this space. Today, we're breaking the pattern, and, instead present mini-bios of the series' stars--Patrick Macnee and Diana Rigg.

PATRICK MACNEE

Born in 1922, Patrick Macnee was raised by his mother and her lesbian lover after his father gambled away the family fortune and ran off. He began acting as a teenager, making his film debut at the age of 16 as an extra in "Pygmalion" (1938). His career was interrupted by WW2--during which he served in the Royal Navy--but as the 1940s came to a close, Macnee was unhappy with the acting roles he was landing in Great Britain, so he relocated to the Americas.

During the 1950s, Macnee took a smattering of theatre roles (including a stint on Broadway), but focused mostly on television. He appeared in both American and Canadian television series and made-for-TV movies, and even dabbled in producing. When he returned to England in 1959, he was cast as John Steed in "The Avengers", the character with whom he is most closely associated. Originally, Steed was just a supporting character, but during the show's Second Season, and the original lead dropped out of the show, Steed became the new focal point and he had a rotating set of sidekicks that came and went until Emma Peel (embodied by Diana Rigg) entered the picture at the beginning of the Fourth Season.

Macnee has the additional distinction of being the only actor who was with "The Avengers" through all six seasons of the original series, as well as "The New Avengers" in the mid-1970s. He even voiced the character of Invisible Jones in the Avengers Big Screen outing in 1998 (where Steed was portrayed by Ralph Fiennes and Peel by Uma Thurman).

During the 1970s and into the 1990s, Macnee was a familiar face and voice on American television and the played supporting and guest-starring roles in numerous television series and movies, primary among them being "NightMan" (1997-1998); the "Thunder in Paradise" series and made for television films (1993-1994); and "Super Force" (1990-1992); and "Battlestar Galactica" (1978-1979).

Macnee was also a regular in B-movies, mostly horror and sci-fi films. Whether he was playing a hero, villain, or victim, he was always a bright spot, no matter how wretched the film around him might be. 

Starting in the late 1990s and continuing into the 2010s, Macnee worked primarily as a voice actor, including making recordings of numerous audio books. His final on-screen role was as the mad scientist in the sci-fi spoof "The Low Budget Time Machine" (2003), which made for a total 170 different characters played on-screen. He passed away on June 25, 2015. 

DIANA RIGG
Born in 1938, Diana Rigg began her professional acting career in earnest upon joining the Royal Shakespeare Company in 1959. While busy with theatre roles, she still sought out television roles. In 1964, she auditioned for the role of Emma Peel on a whim. She had never seen an episode of "The Avengers", and, although her casting was a hurried, last-minute replacement for the actress who had originally been cast in the role, Rigg went on to become the actress most closely associated with the classic television series. She also has the distinction of appearing opposite Patrick Macnee in more episodes than any other regular on the series. 

Rigg played Emma Peel for two seasons of "The Avengers", standing as an equal next to John Steed from the very beginning. Emma Peel was also the only Steed sidekick who got a proper send-off episode instead of just dropping of the story to never be heard from again.

Rigg left "The Avengers" in 1967 to play the female lead in a James Bond film (as, coincidentally, the other most-famous female Avenger, Honor Blackman, had also done), and from that point on, her star kept climbing: Whether Rigg was appearing on stage, on the big screen, or television series or made-for-television movies, she always the lead, or at least a character that was pivotal to the action and plot.

While television remained a cornerstone in Rigg's career, she also remained devoted to appearing in live theatrical performances (sometimes crossing the two), and she was recognized by the British Crown for her contributions to the theatrical arts by being awarded the title of Dame. Meanwhile, film-goers and television viewers got to enjoy her hosting the PBS anthology series "Masterpiece Theatre" (1989-2003); see her as the hilarious human center of "The Great Muppet Caper" (1981), and dozens of other performances in historical dramas, comedies, spy thrillers, and even a few horror movies. The roles she is perhaps be best remembered for, aside from Emma Peel, are Tracy Bond, wife of James Bond ("On Her Majesty's Secret Service", 1968); amateur detective Adela Bradley (in five made-for-television movies, "The Mrs. Bradley Mysteries", 1999-2000); and as noble matriarch Orlenna Tyrell (in the television series "Game of Thrones", 2013-2017).

Rigg had been a smoker since she was 18 years old, and for years she'd regularly smoke a pack of cigarettes in a day. The habit eventually caught up with her, first causing her heart problems which necessitated surgery in 2017, and then lung cancer struck and eventually claimed her life in 2020. She never retired, working straight up until shortly before her death, and the film in which she made her final appearance ("Last Night in Soho" (2021)) was dedicated to her by the director and producers.

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As a bonus, here are a few pictures from one of the stranger promotional photo-shoots that Macnee and Rigg did to promote "The Avengers."

Picture Perfect Wednesday with Rose McIver

Born in 1988, Rose McIver hails from New Zealand. She's been a professional actress and model her entire life, getting her start while just a toddler and making a successful transition from child performer into adult star while carving something of a niche for herself in roles in television series with a sci-fi/fantasy bent: She's played a teen trying to save her world from destruction ("Maddigan's Quest", 2006), took a turn as a Power Ranger ("Power Rangers RPM", 2009), had a recurring role as Tinkerbelle on "Once Upon A Time" (2013-2017), and played an undead, brain-eating crime-solver ("iZombie", 2015-2019). As of this post, she is starring in the U.S. version of the sit-com "Ghosts" (2021), where she's a young woman who can see dead people and who lives in a very, VERY haunted house.