Starring: Billy Franey, Robert McKenzie, and Silas Wilcox
Director: George Jeske
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars
A hobo (Franey) acquires a fake fire plug and a policeman's badge, and sets out to make some money taking bribes from motorists trying to get out of parking tickets.
"The Water Plug" is a swiftly moving comedy that consists of a series of loosely connected gags, first involving water and then the water plug of the title as our hobo hero tries to earn a dishonest buck.
The strength of this film rests with the fact that it's non-stop action from the very beginning through the final fade. While not every gag is bust-a-gut funny, all will at least invoke a smile... and if you don't laugh during the "gopher" sequence, you may need to look into a sense of humor transplant.
One thing I also appreciated about the version that formed the basis for this post (and which you can watch by clicking below) is the original score--composed and performed by Ben Model. Too many of the silent movies you find uploaded to YouTube or elsewhere are saddled with some random bits of public domain music that rarely fits the mood of the film, and hardly ever matches the action on screen. On a simlar note, I also appreciated the history provided as to how this comedy was "accidentially preserved".
Pitch Black Heist (2011) Starring: Liam Cunningham, Michael Fassbender, and Alex Macqueen Director: John Maclean Rating: Nine of Ten Stars
A pair of safe-crackers (Cunningham and Fassbender) team up to rob an office secured with an alarm system that's triggered by light.
"Pitch Black Heist" has all the elements you expect to find in a caper film, and it delivers them succinctly and so satisfyingly that I would have thought impossible in a film that isn't even 15 minutes long. Even more astonishing, the expertly executed and paced heist plot is almost secondary to the development of the relationship between the two thieves, much of which takes place as they hang out in a pub. Watching actors of Cunningham and Fassbender's talent play off each other is a treat in and of itself, but since they are performing within the structure of a great script makes this a must-see movie, especially if you're a fan of crime and/or heist movies.
Aside from delivering in under 15 minutes what many films can't deliver in more than two hours, this award-winning effort from writer/director John Maclean is made even better by the great twist at the end. While it's a given that a heist movie like this will have things go wrong during the heist and that there will be one final twist/obstacle threatening the characters at the end, "Pitch Black Heist" goes above and beyond in every way during its final few minutes.
Grab a drink, click below, and get ready for some great story-telling!
Night of the Living Bread (1990) Starring: Vince Ware, Katie Harris, Robert J. Saunders, Gina Saunders, Stephen R. Newell, Kevin J. O'Brien, and Steve Heminghausen
Director: Kevin J. O'Brien
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars
When a strange explosion at a factory causes bread to animate and attack the living, will anyone survive to see the sun rise again?
"Night of the Living Bread" is a fun, well-executed spoof of the genre-shaping zombie flick "Night of the Living Dead" (1968). In its eight-minute running time, it touches hilariously on all the key scenes and story elements of George Romero's most famous flick... but with the zombies being replaced by slices of bread and hamburger buns.
This is one of those flicks where too much talk by a reviewer will ruin the fun of watching it (which you can do by clicking below, in this very post), so I'll just highlight two things that make this film so good: First, the cast of actors plays everything completely straight (with one exception); this heightens the comedic absurdity of the story. Second, the film has a jump-scare that is so unexpected that even a jaded horror film viewer like myself was startled by it.
Check out this great little flick and have your day brightened. (It will be ten-times more enjoyable if you're familiar with the film its making fun of, but I think it can be enjoyed by any fans of classic horror films.)
Long Cold Walk (2022) Starring: Nat Wise, Rocco La Motta, Stephen Scott, Jessica Rudolph, and Gene Winer Director: Gene Winer Rating: Seven of Ten Stars
A homicide detective on the nightshift (Wise, voiced by Winer), is called to the scene of what turns out to be a greater mystery than he could have possibly imagined.
"Long Cold Walk" is a well-crafted film noir homage with an unexpected twist. Visually, there are a few jarring elements--such as some extreme close-ups that don't seem to serve any purpose and an extra that seems out place with the historical setting of the film--but overall Gene Winer and his crew do a fine job, on pretty much every technical level you'd care to consider.
As this film reached its final moments, I was certain that I would be giving it a solid Six of Ten Stars... but then the twist occured. I was expecting there to be some sort of twist due to a comment made by the narrator at the very beginning of the film, but when it happened, it was not at all what I expected it to be. That twist, and how it was executed, got a star added to the rating all by itself! I've watched and reviewed so many films over the past 30 years that "WOW!" moments don't happen all that often anymore, but Winer delivered one with "Long Cold Walk".
If you like old-school detective movies and TV shows, you're going to enjoy this short. Click below to check it out!
The Gay Goucho (1933) Starring: Gus Wicke Director: Hugh Harman Rating: Six of Ten Stars
Cubby Bear descends from the Argentinian highlands to spend the night with his dancer girlfriend... but when banditos intrude upon their fun, Cubby's defense of her honor places them in deadly danger.
Animation-wise, "The Gay Goucho" is one of the best efforts I've seen from the Van Beuren Studios; the character designs are decent, varied, and they remain stable throughout the entire run-time of the cartoon. Further there are honest-to-god detailed backgrounds and other elaborate scenery, something that's a rariety in a Van Beuren production. There is also a minimal amount of obvious looping and none of the visual gags and other sequences are stretched to the point where they stop being funny and become dull. In fact, one can even describe moments of this cartoon as thrilling.
So why am I only giving it a rating of Six Stars? Because as funny and cute and energetic as this cartoon is, it falls completely apart and the end. The final gag is amusing, but the wrap-up is such a lazy cop-out that I knocked a full star off.
But I've embedded "The Gay Goucho" below for your viewing convenience and--hopefully--pleasure. Let me and everyone else know what YOUR thoughts are about it!
The Detective (2021) Starring: Alex Perri Director: Alex Perri Rating: Nine of Ten Stars
Late at night, a hardboiled detective (Perri) sits down to write a report. But something is amiss...
I have only two negative things to say about this excellent homage to the hardboiled film noir detectives and their cinematic vehicles of the 1940s and 1950s--because Alex Perri pretty much gets everything right in the minute-and-a-half run-time of "The Detective".
First, the narration provided by the title character is a too much. I understand that Perri was trying to fit all the standard elements of a film noir mystery into a very brief space, but it was so intense that it was bordering on parody. It wasn't bad, just a little over the top.
Second, despite my complaint above, I was drawn into the situation that is set up here... and when the end title card appeared, my reaction was: "That's all?! What happens next?! What about--argh!"
So, my second complaint about "The Detective" is that wanted more than what's here. What Perri delivered was so good and so engaging that I was taken aback when it ended. My complaint, therefore, is that this is vignette is so good that I want MORE! I want to know the story that's unfolding around this tiny glimpse into the shadowy world in which this nameless detective lives.
Basically, my complaint is actually the highest praise I can give to any bit of creative story-telling that I come across: I enjoyed it so much that I didn't want it to end.
How about you? Check out "The Detective" by clicking below and let me know if you like it as much as I do!
Betty Boop, M.D. (1932) Starring: Mae Questal (voice of Betty Boop) and William Costello (voices of Bimbo and Ko-Ko) Directors: Dave Fleischer and Willard Bosky
Rating: Nine of Ten Stars
Bobo, Ko-ko, and Betty Boop are traveling snake-oil peddlers who use Betty's charms to seal their deals.
Nice music, weird plot, and even weirder cartoony results of the miracle tonic that Betty & Friends are hawking. All in all, another wildly creative and zany adventure from the Fleischer Studio. It's also one of those masterful bits of entertainment that needs to be experienced cold--I feel that any else I say about the plot and events of the film will ruin the experience.
Aside from the wild strangeness of this cartoon, I also love it because it lets me imagine Betty Boop's world a bit more clearly. There appears to be villages of humanoids like Bimbo in addition to the cities where humans like Betty live. (Heck, Betty's weird looks could be explained by her being a third kind of being... or maybe some sort of crossbreed? After all, when she was younger, she look a bit like a poodle... :) )
A clown (Melies) joyously violates the laws of nature and reality in creepy ways.
This is another instance of stage-magician-turned-pioneering-filmmaker Georges Melies using special effects to bring magic tricks to the screen in a way that would be neigh impossible in a live performance. Generally, I favor his films that feature a bit more plot than this one, but the visual effects are so impressive in this one that I can't help but love it. (Plus, the rambunctious joy with which the clown performs his creepy show makes the film all the more fascinating and surreal.)
But don't just take my word for it. Click below and enjoy a couple minutes of pure weirdness and special effects that are pretty convincing even more than 120 years after this film was made.
How to Get Killed in One Easy Lesson (1943) Starring: Stephen McNally, Barry Nelson, and an Anonymous Narrator Director: Anonymous Rating: Seven of Ten Stars
A captured Japanese sniper explains how American soldiers make themselves easy targets.
I've had to sit through many, MANY training films and video presentations over the years... and very few have been as entertaining as "How to Get Killed in One Easy Lesson". Maybe if they were, I wouldn't feel like going to "training" was such a waste of time.
Take a few minutes out of your day to watch this WW2-era short film... maybe you, too, can learn how not to be seen! (I wonder if someone working on "Monte Python's Flying Circus" might have seen this film as a very young man? There are several similarities between it and some of the more famous sketches on the show.)
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Troublesome Secretaries (1911) Starring: John Bunny, Mabel Normand, and Ralph Ince Director: Ralph Ince
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars
An overprotective father (Bunny) fires his personal secretary (Ince) after he becomes romantically involved with his teenaged daughter (Normand). The girl then launches several schemes to get around her father and be reunited with her heart's desire.
"Troublesome Secretaries" is one of the few surviving films (and film fragments) featuring cinema's first international superstar, John Bunny. He was among a handful of established, well-regarded stage actors who understood and fully embraced the potential of film, and he was as important to building the emerging industry as it was to elevating his star beyond all others.
By the time of Bunny's death in 1915, it was predicted by film fans and professional critics alike that his name and image would continue on forever in human memory thanks to film. As it turned out, Bunny and his early contribution to the art and business of filmmaking would be all but forgotten by the public at large by the dawn of the 1920s. Barely a decade after is death, most of the films in which he appeared were no longer available, because studios habitually destroyed used film prints and original negatives rather than go through the trouble and expense of storing them.
This film is typical of Bunny's emphasis on films that relied more on character interaction than slapstick, and, despite the films lightning-fast pace, viewers still get a good sense of the father's overbearing and persnickety nature, as well as his daughter's capricious and independent ways. Her boyfriend is the sort of bland male romantic lead that will dominate romantic comedies and mystery films for the next thirty years... or maybe the character got a little more personality in the missing third act of the film.
Contrary to my usual habit, I am reviewing a film that has survived to the present day without it's story intact. I have reviewed other films of which no complete copy exists (this Bessie Love vehicle comes to mind immediately), but I don't typically try to evaluate a film that's missing major chunks of important plot material... and no version of "Troublesome Secretaries" that I've seen appears to have an actual ending. But what we have of this film is still so much fun and so well-made (and even a little modern feeling) is that I still felt it's worth calling attention to. I think even viewers who typically don't like silent movies (but who enjoy sit-coms or absurd comedies) will like this one.
For regular viewers of silent movies, this film is interesting, because we get to see Mabel Normand in an early leading role and we get to see that she had radiant screen presence from the beginning. (There's also the bitter-sweet historical fact that Normand--at the beginning of her career--would follow pretty much the same trajectory as John Bunny did: She became a superstar and a household name... and was all-but-forgotten just a few years after her career ended.)
The writer/director of the short film embedded below, Jyotsna Kamath, appears to have spent some time flirting with different creative fields and online "influencing" during the early 2000s (when her profile shots on her various social media pages make her look like she was in her late teens and early 20s. She eventually seems to have mostly given up on those pursuits and taken a job as a flight attendant... but recently returned to the self-employed and more creative realm as a wardrobe consultant (according to her LinkedIn profile).
Based on what you'll see when watching "Requiro", I think you'll agree that it's a shame Kamath was unable to stick with filmmaking. This is a low-key film driven entirely by the emotions of the three very different main characters and how the viewers relate to them. The pacing is near-flawless (with only two minor stumbles that are only noticeable because everything else is so smooth) and every shot is expertly framed. (That last part could be more to the credit of cinematographer Gagan Bains, but Kamath still had the sense to work with him on the project.)
Maybe, someday, we'll get to see more from Kamath. For now, I hope you find "Requiro" as interesting as I did.
Requiro (2014) Starring: Omkar Ghalsasi, Akshay Deolekar, and Aakash Patil Director: Jyotsna Kamath Rating: Seven of Ten Stars
Starring: Mack Sennett, Mabel Normand, Edward Dillon, Jack Pickford, Kate Toncray, and J. Jiquel Lanoe
Director: Mack Sennett
Rating: Five of Ten Stars
A wealthy hypochondriac (Sennett) is instructed by his doctor (Lanoe) to go up onto the mountains to benefit from the pure air. The man's wife (Toncray) and teenaged children (Normand and Pickford) come along for the trip. Snowball fights, illicit lovemaking between the daughter and her boyfriend (Dillon) ensue, with it all culminating with members of the family in mortal danger.
That's a long summary for a short movie, but I couldn't figure out a shorter way to put it. Which is odd, because that paragraph also describes almost everything that happens in the film.
"What the Doctor Ordered" is a fast-moving film where not a second is wasted. In fact, it moves so fast that I wish a little more time had been spent on a few more transition scenes or character interactions to fill in the relationships a bit more. It would have made the film feel less choppy and the story more substantial.
That said, the film is full of raw energy and the actors all give excellent performances. Mabel Normand and Edward Dillon are particularly fun to watch, while Normand's scenes with Jack Pickford have a playfulness in them that will put a smile on your face. Frequent watchers of silent movies may be particularly fascinated to see Mack Sennett in a starring role, since he's usually behind the camera or in very minor parts.
Alice the Jail Bird (1925) Starring: Margie Gay Director: Walt Disney Rating: Five of Ten Stars
After stealing a pie and getting caught by the police, Alice and two of her cartoon animal friends are sentenced to prison and hard labor.
"Alice the Jail Bird" is a simple and straight-forward short film that I think will be appreciated even by the modern members of its target audience--six- and seven-year-old kids--more than it will by adults. That said, I think even little kids will be frustrated by the numerous sequences that drag on beyond the point where they are interesting, as well as wonder why one of the three companions is ignored and left behind during the inevitable jailbreak.
Another flaw, although a purely technical one that may bother me more than most viewers, is the poorly executed integration of animation and live action footage. While Alice does interact more with the animated characters than she does in several other entries in the series, the combination of live-action and animation still pales in comparison to the conceptually similar series from the Fleischer Studios, Out of the Inkwell featuring Ko-Ko the Clown. The film also sloppily breaks with its own conceit when live-action Alice is replaced with an animated Alice in the "long shots". Although I doubt it is something that will annoy the target audience--if they even notice--but it annoyed me enough to knock a Star off my rating. The scenes where Live-Action Alice is replaced by Animated Alice also happen to be the ones where there's the greatest degree of action and interaction between Alice and the animated world. It's a shame that Disney didn't have the budget or the technical know-how/equipment to keep the Alice character purely live action, because some of the sequences in this film would have been amazing. As it is, it's just an annoying bit of incompetence that breaks the consistency of the imaginary world of the series.
Despite its flaws, this is still one of the better entries I've seen of this series. The events all tie together to form a fairly coherent story and most of the gags serve action that moves the story forward. Even better, the character of Alice has a role that warrants her name being in the title; she is not central to all the action, but she is a central mover to the plot.
What I enjoyed the most about "Alice the Jail Bird", though, is the nutty cartoon-world physics that's on display throughout the film. While some of the gags are stretched beyond what's good for them, they remain great examples of the surreal weirdness that makes even these weaker shorts from the 1920s and 1930s still worth watching.
And speaking of watching -- you can watch "Alice the Jail Bird" right here in this post. Just click below and sit back.
A Trap for Santa Claus (1909) Starring: Marion Leonard, Gladys Egan, Henry B. Walthall, John Tansey, William J. Butler, and Mack Sennett Director: D.W. Griffith Rating: Six of Ten Stars
After a deadbeat husband and father (Wathall) abandons his wife (Leonard) and children (Egan and Tansey), the woman inherits a mansion and a fortune from her aunt. They are all unexpectedly reunited on Christmas Eve when the man tries to burglarize the home that, unbeknownst to him, his family is now living in.
"A Trap for Santa Claus" is a fast-moving short film from a filmmaker who helped create the visual language of cinema. Although less innovative than works that would follow later, this cute little Christmas film is full of scenes that are framed and performed by actors who are more effectively blocked and directed for film than was typical in films of this vintage.
As should be expected, there are aspects that have not aged well. Among these are some pantomiming by adult stars Marion Leonard and Henry B. Wathall, as they successfully convey plot points and emotions with gestures. This aspect of their performances will not seem as annoying as it might in some films, because it's balanced out by the effective blocking and more natural gestures and subdued character interactions than was common during this period. The two child actors featured also give performances that feel less overblown than one might expect -- and they even server as effective comic relief as the story moves into its climactic sequence. (John Tansey even does a pratfall with a style that one wouldn't think an 8-year-old would possess!)
I was torn between assigning this film a Six or Seven Star rating. I eventually decided to go with the lower of the two, because, although I appreciate the quick pacing of the film and the universally good performances by the entire cast, the pat happy ending that arises from a Christmas Miracle of coincidences was just a bit much for me. I know this is a Christmas story, so I expected there to be redemption and forgiveness for the deadbeat dad before the film was over, but it felt unearned and too easy. The ending isn't terrible, but I think the century that's passed since this film was released, and the many Christmas movies that have followed, have upped expectations from fare like this. (Of course, with its running time of 15 minutes, there also wasn't a whole lot of time to fit in a proper redemption arc.)
In the final analysis, though, this is a film that's still worth watching, and we've embedded it below for your convenience. Pour yourself a glass of eggnog, sit back, and enjoy!
Alice's Little Parade (1926) Starring: Margie Gay Director: Walt Disney Rating: Five of Ten Stars
War breaks out in Cartoonland, and Alice (Gay) leads her animated friends into battle!
I keep hoping that I'll come across an "Alice" film that will show the spark of genius that will, a few years later, would put Walt Disney on the path to building a entertainment empire. However, all I find is proof that his talent was recognizing talent in others and putting that talent to maximum commerical use... but when Disney was helming his own animation projects, they fall short of what was being produced by other animators and studios.
The problems with "Alice's Little Parade" start with the title. It has almost no connection with what happens in this episode. Sure, she parades her troops before they go into battle, but there was more of a parade in the first Alice cartoon than what's in this one. It would have been far better served by a title that invoked what it was about--a war between factions of cartoon characters. (I do realize that the title is a reference to "The Big Parade" (1926), a movie about WWI, but I don't think it serves the cartoon well.)
A more severe problem is the lazy animation. A couple sequences are looped to the point of tedium--the film opens with one of them--and the backgrounds are so sparse that I think that even the Van Beuren animators would feel bad about cashing the paychecks earned creating them.
Finally, although the integration of the live-action footage of the little girl, Alice, was better than in other installments of this series I've watched, there was still very little of it. Compared to the Max Fleischer series that also mixed live-action footage with animation, "Out of the Inkwell", this is a weak effort. Perhaps Disney was constrained by the fact that his live-action performer was a very young child? That might be a sensible theory, as Margie Gay who appears as Alice in this film had already done more than a dozen of them, so maybe it was possible to get a little more elaborate? I will have to specifically look for a few entries toward the end of her 31-episode run to see if that notion holds up.
With all this negativity, you might be wondering why I awarded this film a Five-Star rating. Well, it's a very low Five, but it's based mostly on the fact that I found the portrayal of war between animated characters in this film fascinating. Although it's half-baked (like almost everything about the "Alice in Cartoonland"), there's enough here to show how surreal a conflict between beings who can reshape themselves and their environment at will, can be. (I also loved the cartoon animal field hospital; I don't know whether Disney was making a fourth-wall joke about how generic all the animated characters are in this series, but that's how it came across to me, and I thought it was spot-on as a bit of self-deprecating humor.
"Alice's Little Parade" is great, but it's not completely without merit either. I recommend checking it out if you like early animation... and I invite you to use the Comments section if you think I'm off-base with this review. (The version I've embedded is interesting in that it features a recently composed score that was recorded and synched before a live audience, and features partial restoration to the point where it looks much better than most of the surviving Cartoonland installments.)
This is also worth watching, because, like pretty much all of Melies' short films, it's better in some ways than modern SFX-driven films. Check it out--it'll only take a couple minutes of your time!
Bubbles and Troubles (1933) Starring: Anonymous Voice Actors (mostly speaking nonsense) Director: Mannie Davis Rating: Five of Ten Stars
When his girlfriend is abducted by pirates, only Cubby can save her!
This Cubby adventure came together better than I had anticipated when it opened. What initially feels like it's going to be a boring mess of unconnected, nonsensical gags--in short order, Cubby goes from doing stunts on his bicycle, to performing magic tricks with soap bubbles to being inflated by one of the bubbles and floating away into the sky--ends up coming together in an amusing and creative fashion when the bubbles of the title end up being central to story as it unfolds.
Almost every moment involving the pirates and their ship from the point the captain decides he wants to add Cubby's girlfriend to his treasure hoard is also a lot of fun. The launching of the longboat was especially amusing. I liked these pirates so much that it's a little hard for me judge whether they're defeated a little too easily, or whether I just feel that way because I wanted to see more of them.
As with the majority of Van Beuren's animated shorts, the use of music is the greatest aspect of "Bubbles and Troubles". The music adds tremendously to this film, and I don't know if I've ever quite experienced "The Sailor's Hornpipe" used so perfectly anywhere before.
But don't just take my word for it. Click below, sit back, and enjoy!
Your Time is Up! (2021) Starring: Nhan La Director: Leon Truong Rating: Six of Ten Stars
A young woman (La) has a fateful encounter with Death.
Our month-long Halloween celebration may have come to an end yesterday, but this tidbit of horror felt like it belonged on the Day of the Dead... so the spookiness continues!
According to notes from writer/director Leon Truong, "Your Time is Up!" was made first and foremost as an exercise in creating a film that captured the look and feel of a silent movie. While he wisely didn't attempt to dress up actress Nahn La as if it was 1919, he did reach the stated goal of this project by using lighting and special effects techniques similar to what filmmakers in the silent era had access to and then manipulating the resulting footage digitally in post-production.
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