Wonder Woman Wednesday

As we continue to look forward to the release of "Wonder Woman '84", we bring you these portraits of everyone's favorite Amazon and her wondrous hair!

By Aaron Lopresti

By Josh Howard

By Milo Manara

By Joe Jusko

By Asisi Suharianto

Joan's May Fifth

Joan Blondell had plans for this Cinco de Mayo.

But then...

Celebrating Star Wars!

It's May 4th -- Star Wars Day! Here's a celebratory gallery of art for your viewing pleasure!

By John Cassaday

By the Artist With a Web-home at this Link

By Howard Chaykin

By Eric Johnson

By Dru Moh

By Stan!

By Bella Rachlin

Musical Monday with Ylvis

"Life´s a bitch," a wise man said
"No matter what, you´ll end up dead,
"And all that you can wish for is a friend."

The Norwegian duo Ylvis is bringing us an especially touching song on this very special Musical Monday...

"Well... that escalated quickly." (Lesson: Don't steal!)

The Devil's Money Bags (aka "The Treasures of Satan") (1902)
Starring: Uncredited
Director: Georges Méliès
Rating: Nine of Ten Stars

A burglar tries to steal sacks of money from an enchanted chest and pays dearly.

"The Devil's Money Bags" is another fun mini-fantasy film from pioneering special effects artist Georges Méliès. Like most of Méliès films, this one serves up some light-hearted fun with its photographic trickery... but unlike most of his films, this one takes a gruesome and downright terrifying turn at the end. Hell... this 100+ year-old movie is more chilling than a lot of horror movies that get made today.

Take a few minutes out of your day and check out this great little piece of horror film history, right now via the embedded YouTube vide below!

Firearms Friday with Mystery Women

I don't know who either of these models and/or actresses are. If you can identify any of these females with firearms, leave information in the Comments section!

'The Indian Scarf' will entertain fans of a variety of old-time movies

The Indian Scarf (aka "Das Indische Tuch") (1963)
Starring: Heinz Drache , Corny Collins, Klaus Kinski, Ady Berber, Gisela Uhlen, Hans Nielsen, Hans Clarin, and Elisabeth Flickenschildt
Director: Alfred Vohrer
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars

After a wealthy man is strangled to death, his greedy relatives gather at home for the reading of his will. Here, they learn, they must spend a week together and that anyone who leaves early does not get a share of the inheritance. Within hours, family members start dying, each strangled with Indian silk scarves. The estate's executor, Tanner (Drache), sets out to match wits with the killer, hoping to discover his identity before he (or she) completes the murder spree.

"The Indian Scarf" is a film that mixes attempts at capturing the tongue-in-cheek feel of the "dark old house" mysteries of the late 1930s and early 1940s, and a bone-chilling brutality that predicts the murder scenes that became a hallmark of early Dario Argento and 1970s B-movies. It's an interesting attempt putting disparate elements together in a single story, and it mostly works because even in the goofy sections we're treated to stylish cinematography and film-norish lighting that takes full advantage of the black-and-white medium. The outdoor scenes, of which the film has quite a few more than is the norm for pictures like this

Another strength of the film is its cast. Their look and the characters they play reflect the "dark, old house" vibe the film is going for, and this goes a long way toward "The Indian Scarf"'s effectiveness. I particularly appreciated Heinz Drache as Tanner, who is both the romantic lead and co-comic relief with Ady Berber as the obligatory creepy man-servant character. The jokes don't always land, but a running gag involving Tanner's detective work is fun, and Drache's plays it up perfectly as the film progresses. Corny Collins and Gisela Uhlen, meanwhile, are both fine as the pretty (but possibly murderous) feminine/love interest presence in the film, while Klaus Kinski serves as a perfect (perhaps too perfect) possible killer. The second half of the film is really driven by the actors and their performances, with every cast-member getting a turn in the spotlight and making a good showing of themselves.

Perhaps one of the most remarkable things about "The Indian Scarf" is its strong ending, one which I didn't see coming, and I'm certain you won't either. Too many old mystery films seem to run out of steam at the end, sputtering to a close, or just stopping rather than ending with a proper denouement. Here, we get a wrap-up that's both punchy and a punch-line. Although there are several humorous misfires, the film goes out strong.

I think fans of directors like Mario Bava and Dario Argento, as well as those who enjoy 1940s mysteries and the "old dark house" genre will enjoy this one.

It's International Dance Day!

Today, we celebrate dancers--and specifically Brigitte Bardot, who trained as a ballerina before she turned to modeling, acting, and, ultimately, social activism. Here are some photos from a shoot she did as a teenager where her dance training and modeling career intersected.

And just for good measure, here's a shot of Bardot from when she was an actual ballerina.

(Bardot will return to these pages again later this year, on a Firearms Friday and at least one Picture Perfect Wednesday.)

The Secret Life of Joan Blondell

Joan Blondell, Ninja Cutie (?)

Evidence has emerged that actress Joan Blondell (who is best known for her roles in films from the early 1930s) belonged to one of the secretive Ninja Cutie Clans. This has been suspected by those who have read the journals of Bessie Love (who led a secret life herself as the Love Bug), but now there is proof.



Take a look at these photos. Who but a highly trained ninja assassin could safely traverse a tiled roof in high heels while carrying a bow and arrow?

Further, who but a Ninja Cutie would smile so prettily while firing an arrow through her quarry's heart?

The fact that Blondell was already known to be an expert swordswoman is further evidence supporting the theory that she was a deadly (but cute) ninja!

All that said, more research is needed before it can be fully stated that Blondell was a Ninja Cutie. The evidence uncovered so far points equally to her being a practitioner of the arcane secrets known only to the Sisters of Bastet.

--
As is our wont when making up things about actresses from the Golden Age of Hollywood, we like to include some roleplaying game rules that either sprang from the process of making things up, or which prompted us to do so. With that in mind, here are a couple of feats for the d20 System game. (If you find any of this amusing or entertaining, maybe you want to check out the Ninja Cuties d20 Modern supplement from NUELOW Games. Click on that link to get it. Selling copies will encourage us to make more stuff, either for sale on the blogs!)

BACKWARDS AND IN HEELS [Ninja Cutie, Sister of Bastet]
Not only do high heels not slow you down, they make you deadlier!
   Prerequisite: 3rd level, Dex 14, Cha 14...
   Benefit: When wearing high heels, except for stiletto heels, the character gains a +2 bonus to all the following skills: Balance, Bluff, Climb, Jump, Move Silently, and Perform (dance).

BACKWARDS AND IN STILETTO HEELS [Ninja Cutie, Sister of Bastet]
Whether you have them on your feet or in your hands, you make stiletto-heeled shoes as dangerous as the knife they are named for.
   Prerequisite: Backwards and in Heels feat
   Benefit: When wearing stilettos, you gain a +2 bonus to Diplomacy and Intimidation skill checks. Additionally, you wield a stiletto as a melee weapon that deals a based damage of 1d6 points.
   Special: When this feat is selected, the character automatically gains Exotic Melee Weapon Proficiency (stiletto heel shoe) as a bonus feat. Additionally, the character can wield two stiletto-heeled shoes at once without any penalties if she possesses the Two-Weapons Fighting feat.

(Special Thanks to L.L. Hundal for shoe insight.)

This Musical Monday, the Writing's on the Wall.

This is a different sort of Musical Monday post, as I'm featuring not just one artist and one video, but two from two different artists. What's more, both featured songs are covers and the videos that support them little more than just the performers performing. You won't find many videos like that here, but today's featured songs by Taps Maguadza and  Sofia Karlberg are too good for me to not post!

Taps Mugadza, or just Taps, is a Zimbabwean soul and pop singer who, among his achievements, has managed to record a version of Sam Smith's "Writing's On the Wall" that fixes the weaknesses of the original--which got a bit repetitive in the chorus as the song went on--and thus manages to be better than one of the best theme songs to recent James Bond movies. Take a listen!



Almost as good as Taps' version, is the one recorded by Sofia Karlberg, a Swedish singer who first became famous by uploading cover songs to YouTube. Like Taps, she brings a little more variation to the song's chorus, but she doesn't bring quite the same level of emotion to the song present in either Taps' or Smith's versions. Also, like Taps, her video is just a recording of her singing... but, again, like Taps, this is such a beautiful song that it's worthy of being featured here.



(An interesting note: Both these versions were recorded and uploaded to YouTube within a month of each other, back in 2015. I wonder why both artists decided to do their videos in black and white?)