Shaheed Sunday: Celebrating brave Jihadists!

You can read all about the glorious strike for the honor of Islam and the Prophet Mohammed (may peas be upon him) made yesterday in Sweden by clicking here.

And here are cartoons presented in celebration of this grand martyr's achievement (as well as providing another image of the Prophet Mohammed (may pinatas be upon him) in all his glory!

For images guarenteed suitable for all your idol-worshiping needs, be sure to stop by for Mohammed Mondays.

'The Ghost Ship' is an offbeat thriller

The Ghost Ship (1943)
Starring: Russell Wade, Richard Dix, Skelton Knaggs, Ben Bard, Edmund Glover, and Edith Barrett
Director: Mark Robson
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars

During the 1940s, producer Val Lewton made a string of landmark horror films for RKO, films with humble origins--he was given small budgets, titles picked in advance by the marketing people, and in many cases additional requirements that he had use certain specific standing sets. Yet, it was in these movies that many of the tricks that horror filmmakers still use to this very day were either first used or perfected. And while Lewton didn't actually direct any of the films, those who did credit him with defining the style and their trail-blazing filmmaking vocabulary.

With "The Ghost Ship," Lewton was given the task to make a horror movie using a ship set left over from the 1938 production "Pacific Liner". As was typical, he more than rose to the task and created a psychological thriller dripping with atmosphere and that keeps viewers guessing about the outcome until the very end. It also features moments of horror that few (if any) directors and producers will never be able to get up on the screen even in their wildest dreams.

In "Ghost Ship", young Tom Merriam (Wade) signs on as third officer of the Altair, a ship under the command of the respected and well-known Captain Stone (Dix). Tom quickly realizes that Stone is gradually going insane, becoming obsessed with power and believing the crew is plotting against him. He tries to call the attention of his fellow officers to this fact, but their loyalty to the captain blinds them to his growing and evermore dangerous eccentricities. Tom finds himself the target of the captain's deadly resentment, but manages to end his contract and leave the ship, safely escaping his clutches. Or so he thinks... as a series of misunderstandings places him right back on the Altair as it leaves for an extended cruise. A cruise that Tom is not likely to survive.

Simple both in story and execution, "Ghost Ship" is nonetheless a tense, character-driven thriller that keeps viewers engaged by placing its sympathetic and reluctant hero at the mercy of a madman that no one but he recognizes for what he is. Further, by demonstrating the homicidal nature of Captain Stone in a couple of very well-staged scenes of horror--the foremost of these being the one where Stone locks a crewman in the housing for the anchor chain as the anchor is being lifted--director Mark Robson makes it seem more than likely that Tom won't live as far as the end credits.

Of course, the tight script and moody cinematography wouldn't have seemed half as effective if the cast hasn't been so good. Russell Wade is a bit bland, but he works well in the part of the earnest officer who finds his idealism crashing headlong into a nightmare, while Richard Dix is almost brilliant in the part of the insane captain, switching from menacing to stern to bat-shit maniacal to coldly rational within short order... and coming across equally convincing in all modes of behavior. Dix's performances makes it absolutely plausible that Stone's insanity could go completely unnoticed by everyone else in his life and under his command, and this is what makes the movie so very scary.

Six decades after it was made, "Ghost Ship" remains a film that would-be makers of horror movies and thrillers should be forced to study and write 2,000 word essays on... especially if their last names are Argento, Zombie, or De Palma. Maybe their film-craft would improve.

Has anyone out there seen "Ghost Ship"? What do you think is the scariest moment in the film? For me, it's the life-and-death struggle during the climax that happens mere feet from a group of unaware sailors happily singing Calypso music.




Interesting Fact: Shortly after the release of "Ghost Ship", a pair of play-wrights claimed Val Lewton had stolen their story and took Lewton and RKO to court. Although an out-of-court settlement offer was made, Lewton didn't want the accusation of him being plagerist hanging out there, so he insisted the case go to trail. The courts found against Lewton and RKO, and the film was was withdrawn from distribution. It was not seen again by the public for over 50 years.

Picture Perfect Wednesday: Christmas Elf in Trouble! Send Help!

Mohammed Monday: What Would Mohammed Drive?

In December of 2002, editorial cartoonist Doug Marlette answered the question "What would Mohammed drive?" with the following cartoon:

He got the usual threats of murder and mutilation from Mohammed death cultists and other followers of the Religion of Peace.

It's interesting how the idolators of the Prophet Mohammed (may peaches be upon him) automatically assumed that the cartoon referred to the Prophet Mohammed (may peas be upon him). Why would they have such an idea? There were no Ryder trucks or missiles in the day of their beloved and most perfect Prophet. And there are all sorts of guys named Mohammed who want to murder people.

Take for example Mohamed O. Mohamud, devout Muslim (according to his friends) and typical Lion of Islam slacker terrorist/mass-murderer wanna-be. In November 2010, Mohmamud provided his own answer to the question "what would Mohamed drive?" and it's the same that the cartoonist came up with. Does this mean that Mohamed O. Muhamud is a Prophet? Or does it mean he is like unto the Prophet Mohammed (may pleats be upon him), carrying on as he would and as he commands in the Most Holy Koran?

The lesson here is that the idolators (and perhaps even the "faithful Muslims") seem to know exactly what Mohammed would drive, whether it be the Prophet Mohammed (may peat be upon him) or Mohamed O. Mohamud, the MOM of all Mohammedans!

In fairness, at least one Imam disavowed Mohamed O. Mohamud, so I suppose this means there is at least ONE Muslim who is peaceful. This also indicates that he is smarter than a lot of Oregonians, many of whom seemed to blame the FBI for MOM's murderous intentions.

(The Mohammed Mondays series will continue on a weekly basis through the end of the year, after which it will become a bi-weekly feature. Submissions are welcomed. Click here for links to background and details.)

'Werewolf by Night' goes out howling

Essential Werewolf by Night, Vol. 2 (Marvel Comics, 2007)
Writer: Doug Moench
Artists: Don Perlin, et. al.
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars

"Werewolf By Night" was one of several titles published by Marvel Comics that played off a mixture of classic movie monsters and 1970s exploitation movie fare. Following the exploits of reluctant werewolf Jack Russell, it was perhaps the most successful of the titles from a pure story-telling point of view, with a direction and tone set in the first few tales in "Marvel Spotlight" that continued with only a minor adjustment up to the title's cancellation with issue #42.

In this massive, low-cost black-and-white reprint book, Marvel Comics presents the second half of one of their greatest horror series, "Werewolf By Night", with the 20 issues of the regular comic benefiting from the presence of a single creative team of writer Doug Moench and artist Don Perlin, and a steadiness of story focus almost unmatched in Marvel's horror titles. Although the title passed through the hands of three different editors, Moench and Perlin seemed to be holding steadily to the same path the series had been following all along, avoiding the numerous re-inventions that kept causing Ghost Rider's motorcycle to sputter, as well as avoiding getting tangled up in too many subplots as Marv Wolfman did on "Tomb of Dracula". There are a number of story threads running through the book--including some that started in the previous volume, one or two of which were unceremoniously dropped by previous writers--and Moench and Perlin keep them all flowing and tie them up very neatly at exactly the right moment every time. They even managed to almost successfully usher the Werewolf into a position of viable superhero as Marvel's horror wave crashed, creating in the process a character that would go onto become one of the more interesting Batman knock-offs comicdom has ever seen, Moon Knight. Moench and Perlin may not have been the original creative team on the title, but they were certainly the greatest.

In addition to the 20 issues of the regular series, the book collects four issues of "Giant-Sized Werewolf" and an issue of "Marvel Premiere". The one thing these additions have in common is that they are the weakest points of the book, not only disrupting the flow of the main story as you read the collection, with forced meetings between the Werewolf and other Marvel horror characters (like Frankenstein's Monster and Mobius the Living Vampire) and stories that just aren't as interesting as the ones in the main title. The exception is the tale from "Giant-Sized Werewolf #3" which reintroduces characters and story elements last seen around the middle of "Essential Werewolf By Night, Vol. 1" and starts a ball rolling that eventually brings us to some of the most effective of Marvel's horror tales.

Basically, as was the case with most of Marvel's horror characters, "Werewolf By Night" was at its best when it stood apart from the greater Marvel Universe. Most cross-overs simply didn't work, including those featuring other horror characters, such as Frankenstein's Monster.

Superhero flair and classic/exploitation horror aren't easy to mix--as my comments regarding the "Giant-Sized Werewolf" reprints implies--but Moench and Perlin tried it with "Werewolf By Night" as the last dozen or so issues of the title moved steadily in a more traditional Marvel direction, with Jack Russell gaining control of his transformations and even coming up against Iron Man in the final issue. But, as Moench and Perlin worked to transition the title, they gave us some of the most effective horror stories Marvel ever published.

In their efforts to tie up Jack Russell's horror past, the werewolf first savagely mauled Jack's best friend, Jack's sister is transformed into a hideous monster when a villain triggers the dormant werewolf within her; long-time supporting cast members Taboo and Topaz return during a show-down with the downright Lovecraftian villain Glitternight; Brother Voodoo shows up to help put Jack's legal problems behind him in one of the most effective appearances of that inherently goofy character ever, a final showdown takes place against the downright Lovecraftian villain Glitternight; and Jack and friends are trapped in a haunted house where the title manages to surpass even the horrific Tom Sutton-illustrated Tatterdaemallion stories of Volume One.

But, as excellent as these stories were, the Marvel Age of Monsters was over. As the 1970s came to a close, so did Werewolf By Night. However, it ended on a very strong note, and the two volumes collecting all the early stories of Marvel Comics' reluctant werewolf are worthy of attention from comics and horror fans alike.

'The Giant Claw' is attached to a fun turkey

The Giant Claw (1957)
Starring: Jeff Morrow and Mara Corday
Director: Fred F. Sears
Rating: Five of Ten Stars

An electrical engineer who happens to be dabble in molecular physics on the side (Morrow) and his mathematician Girl Friday (Corday) work with the United States military to find a way to defeat an invulnerable giant anti-matter bird from outer space that has come to Earth to nest (and eat planes, trains, the United Nations Building, and joyriding teenagers).

"The Giant Claw" is a film that demonstrates that the cheesy science fiction movie hasn't changed in 50 years. I'll leave it up to you to decide if that means this film was ahead of its time, or if it means we should be sad over the state of the art of the genre film. Me, I enjoyed this movie the same way I enjoy the goofy monster films that appear on Sci-Fi Channel during "the most dangerous night of television."

The pacing, tone, and quality of acting of this movie is almost identical to "Monster Ark", a Sci-Fi Channel Original Picture that I saw a while back. Heck, the monsters in the two films are equally goofy looking and they're both animated through the cheapest possible effects of the day. (The alien buzzard in "The Giant Claw" is a marionette attacking miniatures, while the creature in "Monster Ark" is a CGI creature of dubious quality attacking similarly dubiously animated targets or actors performing with bad gore effects.)

If you've enjoyed any of the Sci-Fi Channel's monster movies, you should also give this film a try. Even if you haven't, it's worth a look if your monster movie viewing experience isn't ruined by a little silliness. Unlike many 1950s low-budget monster movies, "The Giant Claw" wastes no time getting started and it keeps going at a fast clip for its entire 76-minute running time.

As silly as the giant space buzzard looks, the crunching sounds as it eats the crew of a plane who attempted to parachute to safety and the anti-matter death-from-above it visits upon a carload of teenagers are actually some pretty good monster movie moments by any standard. Jeff Morrow and Mara Corday also make a good on-screen team.

Check out "The Giant Claw". At the very least, slate it for inclusion in a Bad Movie Night line-up. It's almost tailor-made for such an event!

Extra Picture Perfect Wednesday:The Milla Jovovich Quarterly

Continuing the habit of featuring Milla Jovovich on Picture Perfect Wednesday every three months, we present a look at her methods of preparing for physically demanding action movie roles.

For more Milla, click here for a trio of pictures that show her development from the start of her modeling career to the present day, as part of a research project that proves she has caused earthquakes around the world.

Picture Perfect Wednesday: Merry Christmas from Uncle Creepy

Drawing by Bernie Wrightson. Click here for his website.